**again i got this from the internet**
These are from by-gone days when we actually had little computer machines that would answer the telephone for us. They were called "answering machines," intuitively enough. Roughly akin to voice mail today, but when they came out, they were quite novel. Thus, the were the nguồn of much amusement.
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"If bạn are a burglar, then we're probably at trang chủ cleaning our weapons
right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home
and it's an toàn, két an toàn to leave us a message."
A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not
here. So leave a message.
Hi. This is John:
If bạn are the phone company, I already sent the money. If bạn are my
parents, please send money. If bạn are my financial aid institution, you
didn't lend me enough money. If bạn are my friends, bạn owe me money. If
bạn are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
(Narrator's voice:) There Dale sits, đọc a magazine. Suddenly the
telephone rings! The bathroom explodes into a veritable maelstrom of toilet
paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms windmilling at incredible
speeds! Will he make it in time? Alas no, his valiant effort is in vain.
The chuông, bell hath sounded. Thou must leave a message.
My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your
name and number, we'll get back to bạn as soon as we're finished.
Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now,
because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and
down, and I like doing it left to right...real slowly. So leave a message,
and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
"Hi. Now bạn say something."
"Hi, I'm not trang chủ right now but my answering machine is, so bạn can talk to
it instead. Wait for the beep."
"Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?"
(From my Japanese friend in Toronto)
He-lo! This is Sa-to. If bạn leave message, I call bạn soon. If bạn leave
*sexy* message, I call sooner!
"Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please
speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these
magnets."
"Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with
her tape deck, so I'm stuck with taking her calls. Say, if bạn want
anything cooked while bạn leave your message, just hold it up to the
phone."
"Hello, bạn are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows, hoặc a hot tub, and their carpets are
clean. They give to charity through the office and don't need their picture
taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will
get back to you."
"This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording
device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and
a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call."
"Hi. I am probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a
message, and if I don't call back, it's you."
"Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a
message, and then wait bởi your phone until I call bạn back."
"You're growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. bạn feel very sleepy
now. bạn are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist
suggestions. When bạn hear the tone bạn will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number and a message"
These are from by-gone days when we actually had little computer machines that would answer the telephone for us. They were called "answering machines," intuitively enough. Roughly akin to voice mail today, but when they came out, they were quite novel. Thus, the were the nguồn of much amusement.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"If bạn are a burglar, then we're probably at trang chủ cleaning our weapons
right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't home
and it's an toàn, két an toàn to leave us a message."
A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not
here. So leave a message.
Hi. This is John:
If bạn are the phone company, I already sent the money. If bạn are my
parents, please send money. If bạn are my financial aid institution, you
didn't lend me enough money. If bạn are my friends, bạn owe me money. If
bạn are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
(Narrator's voice:) There Dale sits, đọc a magazine. Suddenly the
telephone rings! The bathroom explodes into a veritable maelstrom of toilet
paper, with Dale in the middle of it, his arms windmilling at incredible
speeds! Will he make it in time? Alas no, his valiant effort is in vain.
The chuông, bell hath sounded. Thou must leave a message.
My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your
name and number, we'll get back to bạn as soon as we're finished.
Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now,
because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and
down, and I like doing it left to right...real slowly. So leave a message,
and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
"Hi. Now bạn say something."
"Hi, I'm not trang chủ right now but my answering machine is, so bạn can talk to
it instead. Wait for the beep."
"Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?"
(From my Japanese friend in Toronto)
He-lo! This is Sa-to. If bạn leave message, I call bạn soon. If bạn leave
*sexy* message, I call sooner!
"Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please
speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these
magnets."
"Hello, this is Sally's microwave. Her answering machine just eloped with
her tape deck, so I'm stuck with taking her calls. Say, if bạn want
anything cooked while bạn leave your message, just hold it up to the
phone."
"Hello, bạn are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages.
My owners do not need siding, windows, hoặc a hot tub, and their carpets are
clean. They give to charity through the office and don't need their picture
taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will
get back to you."
"This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought-recording
device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and
a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call."
"Hi. I am probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a
message, and if I don't call back, it's you."
"Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a
message, and then wait bởi your phone until I call bạn back."
"You're growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. bạn feel very sleepy
now. bạn are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist
suggestions. When bạn hear the tone bạn will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number and a message"
I am sorry. I hate it when i have to do this, because i know that it's really silly! But the only reason why i wouldn't người hâm mộ anyone back, would be if they had joined the twilight saga club. I can see it on their thông tin các nhân and i immediately go all prejudice against them.
I shouldn't, i know, but it's against my morals to người hâm mộ someone who loves the Twilight saga. If you're only a người hâm mộ of Twilight, sometimes i forgive you... if you've done something to earn my respect.
Which would lead me onto my tiếp theo reason...
If bạn have done nothing to earn my friendship, and not joined any of my favourite/major clubs, then i don't feel obliged to người hâm mộ you.
However, if i can see that you're a người hâm mộ of 'Random' hoặc 'Harry Potter' hoặc 'HP v T' etc, then the probability is that i will người hâm mộ bạn back.
On the other hand, if bạn are looking at this thinking that bạn haven't done any of these things, then feel free to người hâm mộ me... i'll gladly return the favour! :)
xxx
I shouldn't, i know, but it's against my morals to người hâm mộ someone who loves the Twilight saga. If you're only a người hâm mộ of Twilight, sometimes i forgive you... if you've done something to earn my respect.
Which would lead me onto my tiếp theo reason...
If bạn have done nothing to earn my friendship, and not joined any of my favourite/major clubs, then i don't feel obliged to người hâm mộ you.
However, if i can see that you're a người hâm mộ of 'Random' hoặc 'Harry Potter' hoặc 'HP v T' etc, then the probability is that i will người hâm mộ bạn back.
On the other hand, if bạn are looking at this thinking that bạn haven't done any of these things, then feel free to người hâm mộ me... i'll gladly return the favour! :)
xxx
(name unknown for now)
Dear, What ever
I am new to this,but I have to try this I can't keep my thoughts in.
And I can't tell anyone so here is what I call an Intro...
Sup,My name is Zain fox.Ah,hell I'll tell bạn my full name.
Zain samuel fox
DONT LAUGH! I am goin' crazy...talking to some book.
I am a very tell bạn what I think guy.
Oh and did I tell you,I am a fucking vampire.
I am new but freakishly strong.
I don't have a girl anymore cus this stupied crave I can't control...
And no I didn't eat her,I left town and she thinks I'm dead.
But she is the most beautiful person bạn will ever lay your eyes on,and her name is Jade.
Even if I stay this thing that jerk turned me into,I will never forget my tình yêu even if I live forever.
See ya,
Zain
P.S
I feel like a girl. Stupied diary!
Dear, What ever
I am new to this,but I have to try this I can't keep my thoughts in.
And I can't tell anyone so here is what I call an Intro...
Sup,My name is Zain fox.Ah,hell I'll tell bạn my full name.
Zain samuel fox
DONT LAUGH! I am goin' crazy...talking to some book.
I am a very tell bạn what I think guy.
Oh and did I tell you,I am a fucking vampire.
I am new but freakishly strong.
I don't have a girl anymore cus this stupied crave I can't control...
And no I didn't eat her,I left town and she thinks I'm dead.
But she is the most beautiful person bạn will ever lay your eyes on,and her name is Jade.
Even if I stay this thing that jerk turned me into,I will never forget my tình yêu even if I live forever.
See ya,
Zain
P.S
I feel like a girl. Stupied diary!
Hopefully I will have another chapter soon, but this story is awfully difficult to write so I'll have to leave bạn hanging. I think my tiêu đề is reasonable (I think my descripton will be something like 'It's đã đưa ý kiến that even the smallest thing has an effect similar to dropping a stone in a pond - it causes a ripple that effects everyone in one way hoặc another.') but please give me feedback.
This just the prologue, but please let me know what bạn think!
***************
We were only young. We didn't know what was ahead of us. We were blind. If we had have opened our eyes we could have stopped what happened. We could have stopped that stone from being thrown in our calm lake.
But it happened, and that's something none of us can accept, even after all these years. I look at the bức ảnh on my end bàn and wonder what could have been. She was the light of our lives, and we didn't even know until she was gone.
This just the prologue, but please let me know what bạn think!
***************
We were only young. We didn't know what was ahead of us. We were blind. If we had have opened our eyes we could have stopped what happened. We could have stopped that stone from being thrown in our calm lake.
But it happened, and that's something none of us can accept, even after all these years. I look at the bức ảnh on my end bàn and wonder what could have been. She was the light of our lives, and we didn't even know until she was gone.
Thanksgiving is my yêu thích holiday, well, one of them, wanna know wy? cause for desert, bạn get pie!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D:D:D:D:D!
"hello there pie, are bạn ready to be eaten?"
"yes i am" đã đưa ý kiến the pie. it was quả bí ngô, bí ngô pie, my fav.
"your the best thing thats ever been invented! i tình yêu you!
"well, instead of thanking the guy who made pies, go thank the guy who made pumpkins!
"oh yeah, huh?
"what are bạn doing?" my sister came intothe kitchen.
"talking to my friend."
"the pie?"
"yeah"
"well, its ready to be eaten"
"OH BOY!! PIE!!!! YEAH!!" Then i started running aroung the house like and idiot lol.
i was SOOOO BORED, so thtas why i made this. blablablabla
"hello there pie, are bạn ready to be eaten?"
"yes i am" đã đưa ý kiến the pie. it was quả bí ngô, bí ngô pie, my fav.
"your the best thing thats ever been invented! i tình yêu you!
"well, instead of thanking the guy who made pies, go thank the guy who made pumpkins!
"oh yeah, huh?
"what are bạn doing?" my sister came intothe kitchen.
"talking to my friend."
"the pie?"
"yeah"
"well, its ready to be eaten"
"OH BOY!! PIE!!!! YEAH!!" Then i started running aroung the house like and idiot lol.
i was SOOOO BORED, so thtas why i made this. blablablabla