Q .. Why did the blonde scale the glass wall?
A .. To see what was on the other side.
Q .. Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
A .. Because on the box it đã đưa ý kiến From 2-4 years.
Q .. Why did the blonde call the welfare office?
A .. She wanted to know how to cook thực phẩm stamps!
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One ngày the husband comes trang chủ from work and his wife says, "Honey, bạn know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could bạn fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes trang chủ from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could bạn change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can bạn please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The tiếp theo ngày the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He đã đưa ý kiến he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake hoặc slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did bạn make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
A young boy enters a barber cửa hàng and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do bạn want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” đã đưa ý kiến the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask bạn a question? Why did bạn take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the ngày I take the dollar, the game is over!”
A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, "Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks." The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a bia bottle and bangs the gator on the hàng đầu, đầu trang of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. "I'll give it a try," she says, "but bạn have to promise not to hit me on the head with the bia bottle."
A .. To see what was on the other side.
Q .. Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
A .. Because on the box it đã đưa ý kiến From 2-4 years.
Q .. Why did the blonde call the welfare office?
A .. She wanted to know how to cook thực phẩm stamps!
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One ngày the husband comes trang chủ from work and his wife says, "Honey, bạn know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could bạn fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes trang chủ from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could bạn change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can bạn please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The tiếp theo ngày the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He đã đưa ý kiến he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake hoặc slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did bạn make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
A young boy enters a barber cửa hàng and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do bạn want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” đã đưa ý kiến the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask bạn a question? Why did bạn take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the ngày I take the dollar, the game is over!”
A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, "Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks." The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a bia bottle and bangs the gator on the hàng đầu, đầu trang of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. "I'll give it a try," she says, "but bạn have to promise not to hit me on the head with the bia bottle."
1. Must [b]love[b] his mother.
2. Shows effection (at least to Her).
3. Is willing to admitt feelings torwords her.
4. Tells his Những người bạn good things bout her.
5. One that will not cheat.
6. Great personality, smart, and funny (Good looks r just a plus!)
7. Tells her how much he loves her.
8. Likes her parents.
9. Willing to take it slow.
10. Listens to her when she need it!
11. That wont jugde her on her looks hoặc anything also.
12. Comforts her when needed!
13. Like the same âm nhạc as her!
14. One that dont call romantic films chick flicks.
15. That is willing to hold her sissy dog in public.
16. One that just him and not trying to be someone else.
17. One that is willing to help and sometyme even cry wit her!
18. One that wont make fun of her when she does stupid stuff hoặc make a stupid choice.
19. One that wont Chris Brown (aka Hit her) her!
20. And last but not least One that will dirty talk sometymes. LOL – Liên minh huyền thoại JK JK JK (Thats just me)
2. Shows effection (at least to Her).
3. Is willing to admitt feelings torwords her.
4. Tells his Những người bạn good things bout her.
5. One that will not cheat.
6. Great personality, smart, and funny (Good looks r just a plus!)
7. Tells her how much he loves her.
8. Likes her parents.
9. Willing to take it slow.
10. Listens to her when she need it!
11. That wont jugde her on her looks hoặc anything also.
12. Comforts her when needed!
13. Like the same âm nhạc as her!
14. One that dont call romantic films chick flicks.
15. That is willing to hold her sissy dog in public.
16. One that just him and not trying to be someone else.
17. One that is willing to help and sometyme even cry wit her!
18. One that wont make fun of her when she does stupid stuff hoặc make a stupid choice.
19. One that wont Chris Brown (aka Hit her) her!
20. And last but not least One that will dirty talk sometymes. LOL – Liên minh huyền thoại JK JK JK (Thats just me)
