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1. "Do not look into laser with remaining eye." -- On a laser pointer.

2. "Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.

3. "For use on động vật only." -- On an electric cattle prod.

4. "For use bởi trained personnel only." -- On a can of air freshener.

5. "Keep out of reach of children and teenagers." -- On a can of air freshener.

6. "Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." -- On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror.

7. "Warning: Riders of personal watercraft may suffer injury due to the forceful injection of water into body cavities either bởi falling into the water hoặc while mounting the craft." -- In the manual for a jetski.

8. "Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." -- A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm bởi 15cm bởi 12cm.

9. "Do not use as ear plugs." -- On a package of silly putty.

10. "Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator." -- On a bag of fresh grapes in Australia.

11. "Warning: knives are sharp!" -- On the packaging of a sharpening stone.

12. "Not for weight control." -- On a pack of Breath Savers.

13. "Twist hàng đầu, đầu trang off with hands. Throw hàng đầu, đầu trang away. Do not put hàng đầu, đầu trang in mouth." -- On the label of a bottled drink.

14. "Theft of this container is a crime." -- On a sữa crate.

15. "Do not use intimately." -- On a tube of deodorant.

16. "Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice." -- On a box of con chuột poison.

17. "Fragile. Do not drop." -- đã đăng on a Boeing 757.

18. "Cannot be made non-poisonous." -- On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid.

19. "Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller.

20. "Excessive dust may be irritating to shin and eyes." -- On a tube of agarose powder, used to make gels.

21. "Look before driving." -- On the dash board of a mail truck.

22. "Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron.

23. "Do not drive car hoặc operate machinery." -- On Boot's children's cough medicine.

24. "For indoor hoặc outdoor use only." -- On a string of giáng sinh lights.

25. "Wearing of this quần áo, may mặc does not enable bạn to fly." -- On a child sized Siêu nhân costume.

26. "This door is alarmed from 7:00pm - 7:00am." -- On a hospital's outside access door.

27. "Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station.

28. "Warning: do not use if bạn have prostate problems." -- On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets.

29. "Product will be hot after heating." -- On a siêu thị món tráng miệng box.

30. "Do not turn upside down." -- On the bottom of a siêu thị món tráng miệng box.
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Source: funniest.1000notes.com
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posted by hetaliaitaly
He came into my life
when I was just a little boy
I was happy and young
And then he changed my world

One night I was in bed
And he came to say goodnight
except he took a little longer
before he turned out the light

He really hurt me that night
And I didn't know what to do
I thought it happened to most
well every little boy and girl

I lay in giường that night
Hurting inside and out
tears streaming down my face
I tried hard not to shout out

I put that tragic night
to the back of my head
playing games at school
there was nothing to be said

A năm had passed along
and then it happened again
My mum was out at work
it was...
continue reading...
Every male human spent the first six to eight weeks in the womb as a female, as the Y chromosome doesn't kick in until then. It is in this time period that breasts begin to develop, which is why men and boys have nipples (I think this may be the same for many mammals, such as dogs).

It took Leonardo da Vinci ten years to perfect Mona Lisa's lips. Also, using x-rays, it was discovered that there are three completely different versions under the Mona Lisa. Another one about this painting: The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows.

There is no vàng in the Australian "gold" coin.

A cat has 32 muscles in each...
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posted by Thecharliejay
Dear God,

I have a special offer for bạn today.

Today's special offer is a used Lady Gaga AND a clean, unused Justin Bieber for the whopping price of only ONE Kurt Cobain! That's right God, trade our 2 *cough* most valued artists for only ONE Kurt Cobain!

But wait!-

If bạn bring back Kurt within the next 30 minutes, bạn also get a FREE complete and PURE set of the Jonas Brothers with it!

*Payment with Visa, MasterCard and PayPal. Talent not included
posted by karpach_13
Men don't rule the world!!!
Men don't rule the world!!!

If men really ruled the world,

1. Breaking up would be a lot easier.
A cái tát, đánh đập, smack to the butt and a "Nice hustle, you'll get'em tiếp theo time" would pretty much do it.

2. Birth control would come in rượu bia, bia hoặc lager.

3. Valentine's ngày would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years.

4. On Groundhog Day, if bạn saw your shadow, you'd get the ngày off to go drinking. Mother's ngày too.

5. St. Patrick's Day, however, would remain exactly the same. But it would be celebrated every month.

6. Garbage would take itself out.

7. Regis and Kathy...
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