Selfless acts were uncommon in her universe... all human contact she'd gotten the last few months were Japanese tourists that wanted to capture the bad side of the city on their nice little holiday, bởi means of escaping the shopping malls, crowded museums and crammed amusement parks that were drowning in bliss and manic happiness.
Yeah, she was the bad side of the city... she was the part that was better left unseen and little people actually saw it. Some of them actually asked for her permission! Why? What would she do? Sue them? She was a stain on the face of society, something like a pimple you're desperate to cover up... close ups wouldn't help her. Lawrence would, though. Lawrence with the soft sheets, family portraits and Baseball cards stuck to the wall. He was nice.
D looked at him as he entered the room, a tray full of thực phẩm balancing on his hand:
'You hungry?'
'Yeah.' A shy smile graced her face.
Lawrence put down the tray and sat on a chair that stood tiếp theo to his bed.
D picked up a fork and eyed the elaborate lasagna he had prepared... how not to start stuffing the whole thing in her mouth without warning?
'I... ummm...'
'Just eat. I don't care. Eat.' He dipped his fork in as to give her the right example and then waited to see if she'd follow. She did.
'It's... good!' Her eyes brightened, a full blown grin now visible on her face.
Lawrence laughed. 'I cook a lot... actually... I have no life at all.'
'Well...' D started, her face falling ever so slightly: 'I'm not the one to laugh at that, am I?'
Lawrence sighed: 'You're not... I guess. Still think you've been through a lot thêm than I have?'
'You could say that... also means you're a wuss tiếp theo to me, doesn't it?'
'It does. I admit defeat. Should I bow down now?' He already stood up, seemingly serious about his offer.
'Would you? Seriously?' A rather devious smirk crept across D's face... this sounded like fun.
'I might, if bạn wanted me to?'
'I'm not sure... are bạn going to Kiss my hand hoặc anything? 'Cause chances are you're going to contract something nasty if bạn do.'
Lawrence laughed again... normally, laughing people earned a scowl from D, but it seemed to be different now.
'Speaking of nasty...' Lawrence's voice turned serious again: 'How are you?'
cà chua sauce dripped of D's chin and she gestured to her mouth before swallowing and responding with the familiar and highly predictable: 'I'm fine.'
Lawrence felt her forehead again, sighing sadly: 'You're not fine. You're actually less not fine than the last time I checked... look at me.'
D did. Lawrence could see her that her eyes were slightly glazed over. He also fully noticed their beauty for the first time, leaving a weird mixture of sadness and awe visible on his face.
'Yeah I know.' D smiled at him. 'Mom always đã đưa ý kiến I was special.'
'Maybe bạn are.' Lawrence lamely offered.
'In a bad way, right? I mean... I like this, okay? I do... but could bạn like... stop, being nice to me? I just got accustomed to the fact that I'm scum, okay? I'm scum, no one really wants me here and when I leave here again people are going to ignore me and... shun me, so stop it.'
'No.' Lawrence said, simply. 'I'm going to treat bạn like a person, talk to bạn and make sure that me and my neighbors won't have to live with the fact that they let a girl die right in front of them, knowing that they could've done something. I'm doing something.' He explained.
'That what happened to your niece?' D asked, out of innocence, really.
'No. No one did something. She's dead.' Lawrence bit at her.
'Sorry...' D's shoulders and face both fell, leaving an uncomfortable look on her face.
'It's... my fault, really. Relax, okay? Just relax. And sleep some more. Can I get bạn anything?'
D coughed... it sounded rather unhealthy and actually required Lawrence's interference. 'No.' Her voice sounded hoarse.
'Are bạn cold?'
She nodded.
Lawrence left briefly to return with pillows and blankets alike.
'There... bạn run away hoặc something?' He asked, casually.
'Yeah.'
'Why?'
'I don't know...' She shrugged, tensed: she was closing up.
She did know why. Because her parents divorced and her mother remarried a fat guy with a Harley that had midlife crisis written all over it and a disgustingly greasy coupe on his scarlet red head. There was also his completely inappropriate use of slang, the pants he could never pull up high enough to cover up his umm... backwards cleavage?
Back then, she already was an insignificance to him. Her name had been Danielle and the fat guy made it Danni... as he would holler that as he and D's mother passed the school on that disgusting midlife machine of his and she didn't like it at all so it became D. Just D.
And on a chilly autumn night, she had left trang chủ and went to the bus stop on the other side of town and waited for the right kind of bus driver: Not the "Never missed-a-day-of-work-in-twenty-years-in-first-out-last" type of guy, but the "Lives-on-RedBull-and-coffee-can't-take-his-eyes-off-the-road-'cause-he'd-crash" Type that wouldn't remember a face and made bạn wonder if he'd go into a full blown panic attack if bạn removed his beloved thermos can out of his line of sight. She went to her dad's first... but found reason to leave there too...
'What does D stand for, anyway?' Lawrence felt the need to save her from what seemed to be painful thoughts.
'Danielle... How do bạn shorten Lawrence?'
'Renzo.' He smiled: the nickname was apparently linked to a good memory.
'Like a clown?' She chuckled.
'Care to disagree?' He challenged.
She shrugged: no, not really.
Wanted to hiển thị their basic personalities here... Lawrence is something of a caring grandfather and D is just a scared, hardened teenager.
Yeah, she was the bad side of the city... she was the part that was better left unseen and little people actually saw it. Some of them actually asked for her permission! Why? What would she do? Sue them? She was a stain on the face of society, something like a pimple you're desperate to cover up... close ups wouldn't help her. Lawrence would, though. Lawrence with the soft sheets, family portraits and Baseball cards stuck to the wall. He was nice.
D looked at him as he entered the room, a tray full of thực phẩm balancing on his hand:
'You hungry?'
'Yeah.' A shy smile graced her face.
Lawrence put down the tray and sat on a chair that stood tiếp theo to his bed.
D picked up a fork and eyed the elaborate lasagna he had prepared... how not to start stuffing the whole thing in her mouth without warning?
'I... ummm...'
'Just eat. I don't care. Eat.' He dipped his fork in as to give her the right example and then waited to see if she'd follow. She did.
'It's... good!' Her eyes brightened, a full blown grin now visible on her face.
Lawrence laughed. 'I cook a lot... actually... I have no life at all.'
'Well...' D started, her face falling ever so slightly: 'I'm not the one to laugh at that, am I?'
Lawrence sighed: 'You're not... I guess. Still think you've been through a lot thêm than I have?'
'You could say that... also means you're a wuss tiếp theo to me, doesn't it?'
'It does. I admit defeat. Should I bow down now?' He already stood up, seemingly serious about his offer.
'Would you? Seriously?' A rather devious smirk crept across D's face... this sounded like fun.
'I might, if bạn wanted me to?'
'I'm not sure... are bạn going to Kiss my hand hoặc anything? 'Cause chances are you're going to contract something nasty if bạn do.'
Lawrence laughed again... normally, laughing people earned a scowl from D, but it seemed to be different now.
'Speaking of nasty...' Lawrence's voice turned serious again: 'How are you?'
cà chua sauce dripped of D's chin and she gestured to her mouth before swallowing and responding with the familiar and highly predictable: 'I'm fine.'
Lawrence felt her forehead again, sighing sadly: 'You're not fine. You're actually less not fine than the last time I checked... look at me.'
D did. Lawrence could see her that her eyes were slightly glazed over. He also fully noticed their beauty for the first time, leaving a weird mixture of sadness and awe visible on his face.
'Yeah I know.' D smiled at him. 'Mom always đã đưa ý kiến I was special.'
'Maybe bạn are.' Lawrence lamely offered.
'In a bad way, right? I mean... I like this, okay? I do... but could bạn like... stop, being nice to me? I just got accustomed to the fact that I'm scum, okay? I'm scum, no one really wants me here and when I leave here again people are going to ignore me and... shun me, so stop it.'
'No.' Lawrence said, simply. 'I'm going to treat bạn like a person, talk to bạn and make sure that me and my neighbors won't have to live with the fact that they let a girl die right in front of them, knowing that they could've done something. I'm doing something.' He explained.
'That what happened to your niece?' D asked, out of innocence, really.
'No. No one did something. She's dead.' Lawrence bit at her.
'Sorry...' D's shoulders and face both fell, leaving an uncomfortable look on her face.
'It's... my fault, really. Relax, okay? Just relax. And sleep some more. Can I get bạn anything?'
D coughed... it sounded rather unhealthy and actually required Lawrence's interference. 'No.' Her voice sounded hoarse.
'Are bạn cold?'
She nodded.
Lawrence left briefly to return with pillows and blankets alike.
'There... bạn run away hoặc something?' He asked, casually.
'Yeah.'
'Why?'
'I don't know...' She shrugged, tensed: she was closing up.
She did know why. Because her parents divorced and her mother remarried a fat guy with a Harley that had midlife crisis written all over it and a disgustingly greasy coupe on his scarlet red head. There was also his completely inappropriate use of slang, the pants he could never pull up high enough to cover up his umm... backwards cleavage?
Back then, she already was an insignificance to him. Her name had been Danielle and the fat guy made it Danni... as he would holler that as he and D's mother passed the school on that disgusting midlife machine of his and she didn't like it at all so it became D. Just D.
And on a chilly autumn night, she had left trang chủ and went to the bus stop on the other side of town and waited for the right kind of bus driver: Not the "Never missed-a-day-of-work-in-twenty-years-in-first-out-last" type of guy, but the "Lives-on-RedBull-and-coffee-can't-take-his-eyes-off-the-road-'cause-he'd-crash" Type that wouldn't remember a face and made bạn wonder if he'd go into a full blown panic attack if bạn removed his beloved thermos can out of his line of sight. She went to her dad's first... but found reason to leave there too...
'What does D stand for, anyway?' Lawrence felt the need to save her from what seemed to be painful thoughts.
'Danielle... How do bạn shorten Lawrence?'
'Renzo.' He smiled: the nickname was apparently linked to a good memory.
'Like a clown?' She chuckled.
'Care to disagree?' He challenged.
She shrugged: no, not really.
Wanted to hiển thị their basic personalities here... Lawrence is something of a caring grandfather and D is just a scared, hardened teenager.
I have a secret: I'm afraid. I'm terribly afraid that I AM GOING TO DIE. I didn't ask for leukemia. Nor did I expect it. Especially not chronic myelogenous leukemia. Especially when chronic myelogenous leukemia tends to affect the OLDER males, and I'm only what, 14?
But do bạn know why it has to be a secret? I have a family: my dad and Jae, my youngest sister. [Yeah, I have two more, but, they're out of my life at the moment.] They cried their hearts out once I was diagnosed. They were afraid that they'd lose another family member--after all, my mother passed away after a car accident. I promised to be strong. For Dad. For Jae. For Mom.
But if being strong means that I have to hold back all these tears, that I have to surpress all my fear in order to comfort my family, sometimes I wish I didn't make that promise.
But do bạn know why it has to be a secret? I have a family: my dad and Jae, my youngest sister. [Yeah, I have two more, but, they're out of my life at the moment.] They cried their hearts out once I was diagnosed. They were afraid that they'd lose another family member--after all, my mother passed away after a car accident. I promised to be strong. For Dad. For Jae. For Mom.
But if being strong means that I have to hold back all these tears, that I have to surpress all my fear in order to comfort my family, sometimes I wish I didn't make that promise.
I was in the class the other day, and Mrs.Crosswaer was handing out new assignments. And he stared at me! Oh his name is Sam, and he was staring at me dreamly!!!!!!!!!!!
It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cooooooooooooooool!
I am SO SORRY! It had to be lonfer so yeah!
It was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cooooooooooooooool!
I am SO SORRY! It had to be lonfer so yeah!
*********************
One lonely sunday afternoon
I sit in my chamber and have nothing to do
My tình yêu is far away
I wonder if (s)he's already forgotten me
So I sadly watch the sky
See the raindrops passing by
One looonely sunday afternooon...
One looonely sunday afternoon
One lonely sunday afternoon
I'm even as my hoa still out of bloom
I find some old photos, covered with dust
I cannot forget bạn although I know that I must
So I sadly let them fly
And this time I have to cry
One looonely sunday afternooon...
One looonely sunday afternoon
**********************
bạn seek for spark of hope.
Your life held by
darkness thoughts,
anchor is
some place else.
Bad luck follows bạn
like a hook,
won't let bạn go,
won't leave bạn alone.
bạn smile today,
and cry whole eternity,
like that's your fate,
disturbing thoughts
to lie inside of you,
to take away everything
that bạn hope for.
Devil is calling your name,
leaves bạn not,
bạn don't see the Angel on
your shoulder,
trying to give bạn a strength.
bạn long for life
that bạn don't know of,
bạn seek for peace,
trying to get away
from misty forest
that stains your heart
into black.
January 16, 1815
Journal,
We have gotten fortunate, Journal! Nastea has found coats in the broken down train. She sits bởi Sasha now, covering her in them. And she took one for herself as well. I can see color returning to Sasha’s cheeks. Nastea coughs harshly, shivering nervously. Her toes are turning blue, and one has already fallen off. We slept in the train last night, getting as much warmth as we could. We have to start to di chuyển tomorrow, find shelter. The berries Nastea fed Sasha seem to have made Sasha a lot sicker than she was before. She’s coughing up blood now. The snow around her is stained with red and pink. I attempted to make a ngọn lửa, chữa cháy earlier, and let me tell bạn journal, it didn’t work out. It’s much to cold to start flames. For every time the ngọn lửa, chữa cháy ignites, it extinguishes, the harsh winds blowing it out. I’m losing my teeth, journal. Nastea can’t talk anymore, and her and Sasha’s hair is mostly gone. Journal, what’s happening to us?
Bye Journal,
Nadia
Journal,
We have gotten fortunate, Journal! Nastea has found coats in the broken down train. She sits bởi Sasha now, covering her in them. And she took one for herself as well. I can see color returning to Sasha’s cheeks. Nastea coughs harshly, shivering nervously. Her toes are turning blue, and one has already fallen off. We slept in the train last night, getting as much warmth as we could. We have to start to di chuyển tomorrow, find shelter. The berries Nastea fed Sasha seem to have made Sasha a lot sicker than she was before. She’s coughing up blood now. The snow around her is stained with red and pink. I attempted to make a ngọn lửa, chữa cháy earlier, and let me tell bạn journal, it didn’t work out. It’s much to cold to start flames. For every time the ngọn lửa, chữa cháy ignites, it extinguishes, the harsh winds blowing it out. I’m losing my teeth, journal. Nastea can’t talk anymore, and her and Sasha’s hair is mostly gone. Journal, what’s happening to us?
Bye Journal,
Nadia