(In a store)

Jareth: How much are these delightful edible crystals?
Cashier: (rolling eyes) they're rock kẹo sir and a dollar fifty.

(Clothes shopping in the mall)

Jareth: (goes up to employee with pair of leggings) excuse me.

Cashier: (looks up) what can I help bạn with today?

Jareth: (holding up leggings) do bạn have these in men's?

Cashier: (weirded out) yeah...ummm...no.

(At job interview for daycare)

Interviewer: have bạn had any experience with kids before?

Jareth: yes indeed, bạn see when unwanted children are wished away to the underground. I simply take them to my lâu đài in the goblin city where they become goblins and continue to serve me.

Interviewer: I see...and what do bạn like to do in your spare time?

Jareth: I like to gaze into my crystal balls, kick and tease my goblin minions and tralala through my ngôi vua, ngai vàng room hát dance magic dance.

Interviewer: (weirded out) ok we'll call bạn letting bạn know if bạn got the job.

(Jareth leaves)

(Interviewer chucks jareth's job application in the trash)

Interviewer: Well he certainly didn't want that job...

(Jareth backs out of Cumberland farms parking lot)

(Gets rear ended)

(Both owners get out of cars to inspect damage)

Owner of other car: oh my god Im so sor---

Jareth: damn bạn peasant I shall throw bạn into the bog of eternal stench before bạn can blink!

(Jareth goes up to an attractive woman at a bar)

woman: xin chào sexy.

Jareth: I ask for so little, just let me rule bạn and bạn can have everything that bạn want.

Woman: excuse me?

Jareth: just fear me, tình yêu me do as I say and I will be your slave.

(Woman smacks him upside the head)

Woman: get away from me bạn jerk!

(Walks out of bar)

(Jareth devastated turns into an owl and flies away)