Jane The Killer

one ngày i was sleeping over at my Những người bạn house ( this happened last Saturday/Sunday) so there was 5 boys and 5 girls ( if bạn include me) and there where no parents, and we where all really hyper so, i heard something down in the basement and everybody was really loud so of coarse i screamed to get there attention a couple of min. later we are all in the basement i went to go look in the closet, and there standing in there was maskey and he đã đưa ý kiến " cheesecake?" then he just walked out of the house saying bye and i'm like "WTF, just happened"

EJ: problem, how are we supposed to get there?

Masky: easy! *takes out phone*

SE: Hello bạn have reached hell, please hold

Masky: Seed Eater! We need bạn to make us a portal to the abandoned SCP facility!

SE: I'm sorry Masky but I work for Zalgo...

Masky: bạn and I both know bạn don't really agree with his ideals

SE: fine... But if Zalgo sends Rake then I blame you!

Masky: ok, we are in Maine

SE: a little thêm specific

Masky: in a forest

SE: a little thêm Masky...

Masky: near black pond

SE: will send it right away!

Zalgo: Seed Eater, have you've seen my glasses?

SE: will send it in a few minutes!

PL: lord Zalgo Demands we strike the proxys on the run... We di chuyển once the purge starts

Purger: yes sir!

*meanwhile*

Masky: man... I'm running out of pills

Hoody: we will get bạn some bro

EJ: the Purge will start in a few Hours... What should we do?

Jeff: they have no business with us

Johnny: they work for Zalgo...

Jeff: Fuc*

Masky: ... Aha!

All: what?

Masky: the abandoned SCP building!

EJ: it's stupid and crazy but what other choice do we have

Johnny: being killed?

Jeff: worst choice ever

Zalgo: where the hell is ShadowLurker!? I need my anger pills!

SL: i'm home!

Zalgo; WHERE THE HELL HAVE bạn BEEN!?

SL: i'm sorry i'm late sir, but on the way I saw some killers that where not with Slender!

Zalgo: DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CARE!?

SL: sir, take your pills

Zalgo: *takes pills*

SL: feel better?

Zalgo: yes... what are these killer's names?

SL: Jacky and Itzy

Zalgo: go get them...

SL: yes sir *teleports*

Zalgo: *sighs*

*ring ring*

Zalgo: *pulls out DiPhone* yes?

Observer: we got BEN

RED: when do we get to kill him!

Observer: we are not killing him! Zalgo get over here before he starts to chew the rocks in this cave

Zalgo: i'll be right there

*2 weeks later*

Slender: breakfast is ready!

Johnny: awesome!... just because bạn don't trust me doesn't mean bạn have to stalk me...

Hoody: I'm not stalking you...

Johnny: bullshi*

Lucius: how the hell did bạn learn how to cook?

Slender: I had a daughter...

Lucius: cool

Porter: I wonder what Zalgo is doing...

*swoosh*

Zalgo: ...

Lisa: ...

Zalgo: FUC-

*swoosh*

Masky: we are clearly out numbered... so we must devise a plan

Lucius: well... we should gather people that are not apart of Zalgo's Army hoặc supporters of it

Johhny: and if bạn let me go I could get my guys to help you...

All but Lucius: NO!

Lucius: do we have a choice?

All but Lucius: NO...

????: hello my dear

???: *screaming*

???: bạn are a sick, sadistic, maniac!

????: to bad... I AM a killer now...

???: do bạn feel any guilt?

????: every single ngày I feel guilt... I killed my family, friends, and my first love!

???: but why did bạn kill them?

????: I was sick and tired of being the last guy that helps every one life's while mine gets miserable!... the wicked and the sinners had the good life... while what ever I did to help they laugh and think I'm the bad guy! so I decided, why be the little model student? be the guy that makes the problems instead of solving them!

???: bạn are crazy!

????: well thank bạn captain obvious!... now if bạn excuse me, I have to meet the devil! take care of the place for me... oh wait bạn can't, bạn are tied up! *sadistic laughing*

???: bạn are in better place Mr. snuggles...

Solonik: ok... its time to make my comeback

Henry: that might wait Mr. Solonik

Solonik: what? how did bạn get in here?!

Henry: it pays to not leave the society before Lumar starts teaching stealth

Solonik: wait wait, let me guess why bạn are here... Demon Lord and Absent Face are fighting?

Henry: yes... WE would like bạn to rejoin, bạn are the weapons expert...

Solonik: thanks but no thanks, I will have a big reputation and clients soon

Henry: there will be none of that if bạn don't help!

Solonik: ...

Henry: fine then... *walks away*

Solonik: wait... let me clean my guns...

Henry: welcome back

Society of Killers

Slender: where the hell are those two...

Lucius: back!

Johhny: *tied up* RELEASE ME!

LJ: Johnny!?

Jeff: bạn know this guy!?

LJ: ya... he was a member of the SOK...

Johnny: bạn WORK FOR ZALG-

Lucius: *slaps Johnny*

LJ: calm down! we don't work for Zalgo

Johnny: LIES!

Lucius: *slaps Johnny*

Johnny: STO-

Lucius: *slaps*

Johnny: HEY-

Lucius: *slaps*

Johnny: ok i'll stop

Lucius: *slaps*

Johnny: I đã đưa ý kiến I WOULD STOP!

Lucius: oops... sorry...

Johnny: bạn better be!

Guard: bạn have a visitor Lecter

Lecter: ...

Guard: bạn talk about every thing but when there is someone that ACT- *flop*

Lecter: hello Henry

Henry: hello Mr. Lecter

Lecter: so... what is your business here?

Henry: well... bạn are the smartest of the killers and would be the most civil if it was not for your... skin diet...

Lecter: they broke the treaty?

Henry: exactly

Lecter: well then... may bạn open the door for me?

Henry: yes sir Mr. Lecter

*opens door*

Henry: welcome back

Society of Killers

*meanwhile*

Henry: sorry Mr.Kage but-

Kagekao: it is ok... Henry... I have another job for you...

Henry: yes master... what is it?

Kagekao: gather the team...

Henry: yes sir!

*back to the story!*

Lucius: hey! what happened to Toby?

Slender: I sent him to my brother

*TV hiển thị swoosh*

Splender: Toby, would bạn like some thêm tea?

Toby: yes!

Splender: Mr. Fluff, would bạn like some thêm tea?

Mr.Fluff [Toby]: yes I do!

Audience: *laughing*

* "everybody hates Chris" commercial break song *

Zalgo: hmmmm...

Observer: hmmmm...

SL: hmmmm...

Lisa: hmmmm...

Targeter: hmmmm...

Pyris: hmmm...

BVRV: pika...

Zalgo: I got it!

All: what is it?

Zalgo: ok so someone knocks Slender out...

Observer: and?

Zalgo: then we bring him here and chain him to the wall...

Targeter: and?

Zalgo: then we capture his proxys and torture them so he gives up!

Observer: but wouldn't he just "Slender walk" out of the chains and warn them?

Zalgo: ._.

All: ._.

Zalgo: fuc*

Slender: what the hell happened to my house!?

Me: sorry, we need the ratings man!

Slender: *sigh*

ToTheArk: i'm out! REGARDS!

Slender: what is happening Masky!?

Masky: everybody is taking sides!

Slender: observer...

Lucius: *carrying Jeff*

Slender: where is the Observer?

Lucius: he is in the dining hall!

Slender: Lucius, come with me!

Lucius: *drops Jeff*

Jeff: ow...

Slender: OBSERVER!

Observer: hello my friend

Slender: WHY ARE bạn DOING THIS!

Lucius: he thinks bạn are a absent faced jack*ss

Slender: ...

Observer: heh heh... shi*

Slender: Observer, bạn are in charge

Observer: yes sir...

Slender: train the new proxy for me *slender walks*

*Ding Dong*

Masky: yes? *opens door*

???: contract for bạn sir

Masky: thanks seedy

SE: bạn are welcome masky

Masky: Who is your friend?

SE: His name is Porter... he is a rouge SCP

Lucius: ok lets add that to the what the hell is that list...

Sonic.EXE: now is my chance to get out of here!

Lucius: *shoots tazer*

Sonic.EXE: jnhjhbjanjkbneailoveKFCgjablaeamnsjn *faints*

Lucius: I win