"The Rules" from the male side
We always hear ‘the rules’ from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. I’m not saying I like them, but it’s only fair to present both sides.
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up. bạn need it down. bạn don’t hear us complaining about bạn leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports: It’s like the full moon hoặc the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Breasts are for looking at and that is why we do it. Don't try to change that.
6. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
7. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
8. Ask for what bạn want. Let us be clear on this one! Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
9. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable các câu trả lời to almost every question.
10. Come to us with a problem only if bạn want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
11. Anything we đã đưa ý kiến 6 months cách đây is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all các bình luận become Null and void after 7 Days.
12. If bạn think you’re fat, bạn probably are. Don’t ask us.
13. If something we đã đưa ý kiến can be interpreted in two ways and one of the ways makes bạn sad hoặc angry, we meant the other one.
14. You can either ask us to do something hoặc tell us how bạn want it done. Not both. If bạn already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
15. Whenever possible, Please say whatever bạn have to say during commercials.
16. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
17. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. quả bí ngô, bí ngô is also a fruit. We have NO idea what mauve is.
18. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
19. If we ask what is wrong and bạn say ‘nothing,’ we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know bạn are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
20. If bạn ask a câu hỏi bạn don’t want an answer to, expect an answer bạn don’t want to hear.
21. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything bạn wear is fine… Really!
22. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless bạn are prepared to discuss such topics as Sex, Sport, hoặc Cars.
23. You have enough clothes.
24. You have too many shoes.
25. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
26. Thank bạn for đọc this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the đi văng tonight, but did bạn know men really don't mind that, it’s like camping.
