Pain stood at a podium and said, “My fellow Akatsuki, we are here to honor the loss of our comrade Sasori.”
Pain looked at the side of the room and saw that Kisame was getting thực phẩm served to him from a buffet bởi Zetsu and Konan.
“Hey we aren’t supposed to start eating until the service is over,” Pain complained.
“Well bạn are kind of losing the crowd sir,” Zetsu said, “Maybe try to liven it up a bit.”
“It’s a funeral,” Pain said, “If things were alive we wouldn’t be here in the first place.”
Pain looked out at the crowd to see Hidan snoring with a small stream of drool going down his cheek. Kakuzu was sitting tiếp theo to him counting money in his hand. Kisame sat back down tiếp theo to Itachi and began eating as he handed Itachi his dango. Tobi was wailing while holding a box of tissues with Deidara inching away from him.
“Now Deidara will deliver a eulogy for Sasori,” Pain đã đưa ý kiến as he waved Deidara up.
Deidara’s eyes went wide. “You didn’t say anything about nghề viết văn a eulogy un,” Deidara said.
“You were his partner,” Pain replied, “Who did bạn think would give the eulogy?”
“I figured since bạn like to hear yourself talk so much bạn would do it un,” đã đưa ý kiến Deidara.
Before Pain could respond Tobi raised his hand. “Tobi wants to say something about Sasori-Sempai,” Tobi đã đưa ý kiến tearfully.
Pain looked surprised. “I guess it couldn’t hurt anything,” Pain đã đưa ý kiến as Tobi walked up to the podium with tissues in hand.
Tobi looked out at the crowd and said, “Even though Tobi never got to meet Sasori-Sempai, without him Tobi would never have met his bestest friend in the whole wide world, Deidara-Sempai.”
Deidara hid his face within his áo choàng as the other members snickered at him.
Tobi continued, “Tobi knows Sasori-Sempai would be his bestest friend too. Maybe in Akatsuki heaven we can be bestest Những người bạn together.”
Tobi suddenly burst into tears and shouted, “Come back to us!” Tobi then jumps into the casket and hugs Sasori’s puppet body stunning everyone. Pain pried Tobi off of Sasori and put him back in his seat.
“Okay then,” Pain said, “Anyone else have something to say?”
As no one đã đưa ý kiến anything, Pain pulled Kakuzu up to the podium with his Bansho Tensei. Pain asked, “Why don’t bạn say something Kakuzu?”
Kakuzu put his money in his pocket and stood up. “Well I didn’t really no Sasori either, but I made a ton of cash selling his puppets to Sunagakure,” Kakuzu đã đưa ý kiến as he looked at Sasori’s body, “So thanks for the free merchandise.”
Pain rubbed the side of his temple. “Hidan,” he said, “You’re a priest. Can bạn say some spiritual mumbo jumbo?”
Hidan stood up and took Kakuzu’s place on the podium. “I shall open with a Jashinist Prayer,” Hidan said, “******* ****** ******* ***** ********.”
Everyone’s mouth hung open in shock. Pain raised his hand and said, “Shinra Tensei,” launching Hidan out of the cave.
Tobi looked at Deidara and asked, “What do those words mean Sempai?”
Deidara said, “We will tell bạn when you’re older Tobi un.”
Konan walked up to the podium and placed a bouquet of paper hoa in the casket and asked, “Where did his body go?”
Everyone looked at Kakuzu.
“What?” he asked.
“You’re not selling that one Kakuzu,” Pain said, “Put it back.”
Kakuzu muttered under his breath as he set it back in the casket.
Pain got back to the podium and said, “I think I’ll just read Sasori’s last will and testament to close out the ceremony.”
Pain began to read the paper, “I, Sasori of the red sand, wish to make this final statement to bạn my fellow Akatsuki members. To Deidara I wish to say, get a haircut because bạn look like a girl. Also get help bạn pyromaniac. To Kakuzu I wish to say, if bạn sell my puppets I will haunt bạn forever. To Hidan I wish to say, shut up. To Konan I wish to say, origami is not a real art form. To Pain I wish to say, the piercings don’t make bạn look tough. They just make bạn look thêm emo than Itachi. To Kisame I wish to say, bạn need to do something about your blue skin. Try moisturizer. To Zetsu, be grateful I mentioned bạn at all.”
Everyone looked annoyed as Pain finished đọc the will. Deidara asked, “Can I blow him up now un?”
Pain threw the paper out and said, “Have at it. From now on when a member dies we just have a moment of silence.”
Pain looked at the side of the room and saw that Kisame was getting thực phẩm served to him from a buffet bởi Zetsu and Konan.
“Hey we aren’t supposed to start eating until the service is over,” Pain complained.
“Well bạn are kind of losing the crowd sir,” Zetsu said, “Maybe try to liven it up a bit.”
“It’s a funeral,” Pain said, “If things were alive we wouldn’t be here in the first place.”
Pain looked out at the crowd to see Hidan snoring with a small stream of drool going down his cheek. Kakuzu was sitting tiếp theo to him counting money in his hand. Kisame sat back down tiếp theo to Itachi and began eating as he handed Itachi his dango. Tobi was wailing while holding a box of tissues with Deidara inching away from him.
“Now Deidara will deliver a eulogy for Sasori,” Pain đã đưa ý kiến as he waved Deidara up.
Deidara’s eyes went wide. “You didn’t say anything about nghề viết văn a eulogy un,” Deidara said.
“You were his partner,” Pain replied, “Who did bạn think would give the eulogy?”
“I figured since bạn like to hear yourself talk so much bạn would do it un,” đã đưa ý kiến Deidara.
Before Pain could respond Tobi raised his hand. “Tobi wants to say something about Sasori-Sempai,” Tobi đã đưa ý kiến tearfully.
Pain looked surprised. “I guess it couldn’t hurt anything,” Pain đã đưa ý kiến as Tobi walked up to the podium with tissues in hand.
Tobi looked out at the crowd and said, “Even though Tobi never got to meet Sasori-Sempai, without him Tobi would never have met his bestest friend in the whole wide world, Deidara-Sempai.”
Deidara hid his face within his áo choàng as the other members snickered at him.
Tobi continued, “Tobi knows Sasori-Sempai would be his bestest friend too. Maybe in Akatsuki heaven we can be bestest Những người bạn together.”
Tobi suddenly burst into tears and shouted, “Come back to us!” Tobi then jumps into the casket and hugs Sasori’s puppet body stunning everyone. Pain pried Tobi off of Sasori and put him back in his seat.
“Okay then,” Pain said, “Anyone else have something to say?”
As no one đã đưa ý kiến anything, Pain pulled Kakuzu up to the podium with his Bansho Tensei. Pain asked, “Why don’t bạn say something Kakuzu?”
Kakuzu put his money in his pocket and stood up. “Well I didn’t really no Sasori either, but I made a ton of cash selling his puppets to Sunagakure,” Kakuzu đã đưa ý kiến as he looked at Sasori’s body, “So thanks for the free merchandise.”
Pain rubbed the side of his temple. “Hidan,” he said, “You’re a priest. Can bạn say some spiritual mumbo jumbo?”
Hidan stood up and took Kakuzu’s place on the podium. “I shall open with a Jashinist Prayer,” Hidan said, “******* ****** ******* ***** ********.”
Everyone’s mouth hung open in shock. Pain raised his hand and said, “Shinra Tensei,” launching Hidan out of the cave.
Tobi looked at Deidara and asked, “What do those words mean Sempai?”
Deidara said, “We will tell bạn when you’re older Tobi un.”
Konan walked up to the podium and placed a bouquet of paper hoa in the casket and asked, “Where did his body go?”
Everyone looked at Kakuzu.
“What?” he asked.
“You’re not selling that one Kakuzu,” Pain said, “Put it back.”
Kakuzu muttered under his breath as he set it back in the casket.
Pain got back to the podium and said, “I think I’ll just read Sasori’s last will and testament to close out the ceremony.”
Pain began to read the paper, “I, Sasori of the red sand, wish to make this final statement to bạn my fellow Akatsuki members. To Deidara I wish to say, get a haircut because bạn look like a girl. Also get help bạn pyromaniac. To Kakuzu I wish to say, if bạn sell my puppets I will haunt bạn forever. To Hidan I wish to say, shut up. To Konan I wish to say, origami is not a real art form. To Pain I wish to say, the piercings don’t make bạn look tough. They just make bạn look thêm emo than Itachi. To Kisame I wish to say, bạn need to do something about your blue skin. Try moisturizer. To Zetsu, be grateful I mentioned bạn at all.”
Everyone looked annoyed as Pain finished đọc the will. Deidara asked, “Can I blow him up now un?”
Pain threw the paper out and said, “Have at it. From now on when a member dies we just have a moment of silence.”
