So, these past couple months, I've picked up a few things. My story in a nutshell: I sat behind my crush in class, didn't start liking him until the last tháng hoặc so of school, didn't get too many chances to talk to him due to the teacher's way of running the class, and I spent those last few weeks desperately trying to befriend him.
Anyways, here are some things I've learned from the whole experience.
1. Don't EVER pass up an opportunity to talk to ANYONE you're sitting near in class (doesn't matter if it's high school, college, work, whatever), and don't EVER take a conversation for granted. bạn never know how desperate bạn might be later on to be Những người bạn with them. This was probably my biggest mistake; the first time my guy and I talked, I played along, no real issues, but I didn't think much of it. He just seemed like another guy, and I always waited for him to talk to me, and rarely took initiative to start a conversation myself hoặc to carry it on. Just thinking of what could've been, that sense of regret of not taking thêm chances from the start really stings.
2. Don't be afraid! I know that saying may be overrated, but it's true. I used to be so intimidated bởi the thought of trying to talk to him, just as most girls are with their mega crushes, but seriously, you've gotta take the chance, trust me. If bạn get shot down, well, bạn haven't really Mất tích anything, right? Better to regret things bạn did than regret things bạn didn't do.
3. Make eye contact. I know, scary, right? I used to always be super intimidated bởi it, but trust me, you'll look WAY thêm awkward if you're NOT making eye contact than if bạn are. This doesn't just apply to conversation; even walking bởi them in the hall hoặc if bạn see them somewhere outside of class. I used to not make eye contact with my crush when I walked right bởi him to my ghế, chỗ ngồi every day. I feel like if I had done that from that start, that very simple gesture of looking at him and smiling, things would've been different. I would've được trao off a much thêm friendly vibe.
4. Stay focused talking about THEM, NOT about yourself. We all, as humans, have a tendency to talk about ourselves a lot; it's our yêu thích topic. However, it can bore people easily. Instead, try to keep asking các câu hỏi about them and bouncing off that. But be careful not to make it an interrogation. :P
5. If the person if Những người bạn with any of your friends, TALK TO YOUR Những người bạn ABOUT IT. Once I revealed to our mutual Những người bạn that I liked this guy, they helped me out so much to hang out with him and get to know him better. I wouldn't have even got half as far as I did if it weren't for them. If bạn find out where he works, grab a friend and casually go visit.
6. I thought this sounded pathetic at first, but it really helps: try thinking of a few topics to bring up beforehand, even if bạn have to write them down and review them a few times, just give it a shot. No one needs to know.
7. Now for bạn high schoolers, if you're planning on going to prom, hoặc homecoming, etc. and desperately want to go with your crush like I did, please, take my advice: DO IT. As long as they're single, just go up and ask them. This is one of my biggest regrets. My guy was single for a while, until he decided t go with one of his friends, and I had the chance to ask him, but my fear of rejection and my fear of losing hope to befriend him stopped me from taking the chance. Prom was still fun and all, but I had to keep looking back at him with his ngày all night and it was a real downer. bạn never know what might happen, so just do it, unless bạn are absolutely 100% positive that they'll say no. And hey, if they do turn bạn down, just smile and take it with dignity, so bạn still have a chance to at least be friends. If you're not sure if bạn want to go with them hoặc not, hey, I wasn't sure either, until I got there and saw him with his date, and my Những người bạn with their dates. So just go for it.
8. Now, this is also very important. Even though it's crucial to take risks and try your best to talk to the person and all, it's also crucial to GIVE THEM THEIR SPACE. If they seem uninterested in the conversation you're trying to have, hoặc if they don't really try to carry it on, hoặc if bạn can just see it in their face, just stop right there and give them a break. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like bạn hoặc anything, but everyone needs space. If they're giving bạn a signal, bạn need to respect that. I had to deal with this, and it's not fun, but it DOESN'T mean bạn should give up altogether. Just give them a ngày hoặc two, and try again. I followed this motto: be friendly, not desperate.
9. If it's a situation like mine, where in class, hoặc even outside of class for that matter, they're always around their friends, and seem much thêm interested in talking to them than with you, just accept it and respect it. Doesn't mean they're neglecting you, but guys especially, with their bro friends... it can be kinda difficult to talk to your guy crush in that situation. Just try to interact with all of them, but don't try too hard. And on your part, always always ALWAYS be sure that bạn DON'T neglect your own Những người bạn for your crush. I know that;s đã đưa ý kiến a lot, but some things are much easier đã đưa ý kiến than done. I used to kinda ditch my Những người bạn a little bởi taking off from that class to the class I had with him, just for a tiny bit thêm time to possibly talk to him. Don't do it; doing things like that just isn't cool.
10. Lastly, have confidence and determination! It really shows if bạn have it hoặc lack it. Have a positive mindset; don't ever get your hopes up too high, otherwise you'll be that much thêm crushed if things don't go well. Instead, plan ahead for success hoặc failure, and be ready to accept either one. If it doesn't work out, it's okay. Just take chances, not too many, and try to have fun with it. bạn never know what awesome result could come out of one simple bình luận hoặc action.
Please note that I'm definitely no expert, not even close :P. But I have learned these things all from personal experience, some things came the easy way, some things the hard way. I'm still trying to apply these things into my own life. I'm not trying to preach hoặc lecture, but this is my Lời khuyên that I have to offer. I hate how I didn't take certain chances while I still could, and I hate the thought of other people doing the same thing and feeling the regret that I feel. So, I guess that concludes my little ramble :P.
And thank bạn to those of bạn who gave me Lời khuyên on my crush a little while back; bạn know who bạn are. :)
Anyways, here are some things I've learned from the whole experience.
1. Don't EVER pass up an opportunity to talk to ANYONE you're sitting near in class (doesn't matter if it's high school, college, work, whatever), and don't EVER take a conversation for granted. bạn never know how desperate bạn might be later on to be Những người bạn with them. This was probably my biggest mistake; the first time my guy and I talked, I played along, no real issues, but I didn't think much of it. He just seemed like another guy, and I always waited for him to talk to me, and rarely took initiative to start a conversation myself hoặc to carry it on. Just thinking of what could've been, that sense of regret of not taking thêm chances from the start really stings.
2. Don't be afraid! I know that saying may be overrated, but it's true. I used to be so intimidated bởi the thought of trying to talk to him, just as most girls are with their mega crushes, but seriously, you've gotta take the chance, trust me. If bạn get shot down, well, bạn haven't really Mất tích anything, right? Better to regret things bạn did than regret things bạn didn't do.
3. Make eye contact. I know, scary, right? I used to always be super intimidated bởi it, but trust me, you'll look WAY thêm awkward if you're NOT making eye contact than if bạn are. This doesn't just apply to conversation; even walking bởi them in the hall hoặc if bạn see them somewhere outside of class. I used to not make eye contact with my crush when I walked right bởi him to my ghế, chỗ ngồi every day. I feel like if I had done that from that start, that very simple gesture of looking at him and smiling, things would've been different. I would've được trao off a much thêm friendly vibe.
4. Stay focused talking about THEM, NOT about yourself. We all, as humans, have a tendency to talk about ourselves a lot; it's our yêu thích topic. However, it can bore people easily. Instead, try to keep asking các câu hỏi about them and bouncing off that. But be careful not to make it an interrogation. :P
5. If the person if Những người bạn with any of your friends, TALK TO YOUR Những người bạn ABOUT IT. Once I revealed to our mutual Những người bạn that I liked this guy, they helped me out so much to hang out with him and get to know him better. I wouldn't have even got half as far as I did if it weren't for them. If bạn find out where he works, grab a friend and casually go visit.
6. I thought this sounded pathetic at first, but it really helps: try thinking of a few topics to bring up beforehand, even if bạn have to write them down and review them a few times, just give it a shot. No one needs to know.
7. Now for bạn high schoolers, if you're planning on going to prom, hoặc homecoming, etc. and desperately want to go with your crush like I did, please, take my advice: DO IT. As long as they're single, just go up and ask them. This is one of my biggest regrets. My guy was single for a while, until he decided t go with one of his friends, and I had the chance to ask him, but my fear of rejection and my fear of losing hope to befriend him stopped me from taking the chance. Prom was still fun and all, but I had to keep looking back at him with his ngày all night and it was a real downer. bạn never know what might happen, so just do it, unless bạn are absolutely 100% positive that they'll say no. And hey, if they do turn bạn down, just smile and take it with dignity, so bạn still have a chance to at least be friends. If you're not sure if bạn want to go with them hoặc not, hey, I wasn't sure either, until I got there and saw him with his date, and my Những người bạn with their dates. So just go for it.
8. Now, this is also very important. Even though it's crucial to take risks and try your best to talk to the person and all, it's also crucial to GIVE THEM THEIR SPACE. If they seem uninterested in the conversation you're trying to have, hoặc if they don't really try to carry it on, hoặc if bạn can just see it in their face, just stop right there and give them a break. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like bạn hoặc anything, but everyone needs space. If they're giving bạn a signal, bạn need to respect that. I had to deal with this, and it's not fun, but it DOESN'T mean bạn should give up altogether. Just give them a ngày hoặc two, and try again. I followed this motto: be friendly, not desperate.
9. If it's a situation like mine, where in class, hoặc even outside of class for that matter, they're always around their friends, and seem much thêm interested in talking to them than with you, just accept it and respect it. Doesn't mean they're neglecting you, but guys especially, with their bro friends... it can be kinda difficult to talk to your guy crush in that situation. Just try to interact with all of them, but don't try too hard. And on your part, always always ALWAYS be sure that bạn DON'T neglect your own Những người bạn for your crush. I know that;s đã đưa ý kiến a lot, but some things are much easier đã đưa ý kiến than done. I used to kinda ditch my Những người bạn a little bởi taking off from that class to the class I had with him, just for a tiny bit thêm time to possibly talk to him. Don't do it; doing things like that just isn't cool.
10. Lastly, have confidence and determination! It really shows if bạn have it hoặc lack it. Have a positive mindset; don't ever get your hopes up too high, otherwise you'll be that much thêm crushed if things don't go well. Instead, plan ahead for success hoặc failure, and be ready to accept either one. If it doesn't work out, it's okay. Just take chances, not too many, and try to have fun with it. bạn never know what awesome result could come out of one simple bình luận hoặc action.
Please note that I'm definitely no expert, not even close :P. But I have learned these things all from personal experience, some things came the easy way, some things the hard way. I'm still trying to apply these things into my own life. I'm not trying to preach hoặc lecture, but this is my Lời khuyên that I have to offer. I hate how I didn't take certain chances while I still could, and I hate the thought of other people doing the same thing and feeling the regret that I feel. So, I guess that concludes my little ramble :P.
And thank bạn to those of bạn who gave me Lời khuyên on my crush a little while back; bạn know who bạn are. :)
