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added by EimieRose
posted by -Yusha-
Death came to a guy and said: "My friend today is your day."

Guy:"But I'm not ready!"
Then death said,"well your name is the tiếp theo on my list".

Guy:"Okay why don't bạn take a ghế, chỗ ngồi and I will get bạn something to eat before we go?".

Then death said,"all right"
The guy gave death some thực phẩm with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.

The guy took the danh sách and removed his name from the hàng đầu, đầu trang of the danh sách and put it at the bottom of the list.

When death woke up he đã đưa ý kiến to the guy, "Because bạn have been so nice to me, I will start from the BOTTOM of the danh sách ..."

Moral of the story: - Whatever is written in your destiny ... Will never change no matter how much bạn try!!
posted by invadercalliope
I wanna be the very best

Like no one ever was

To catch them is my real test

To train them is my cause

I will travel across the land

Searching far and wide

Teach Pokemon to understand

The power that's inside

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

It's bạn and me

I know it's my destiny

Pokemon!

Ooooh, you're my best friend

In a world we must defend

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

Our hearts so true

Our courage will pull us through

You teach me and I'll teach you

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Yeeaa.

Every challenge along the way

With courage I can face



To claim my rightful place

Come with me the time is right...
continue reading...
posted by jessicamc26
A stoner called the ngọn lửa, chữa cháy department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"






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posted by sapherequeen
 :)
:)
I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a người hâm mộ of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on fanpop towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I tình yêu and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of bạn for the rest of my life :)

I tình yêu bạn all! Have a beautiful, wonderful ngày :D
 -LOL!-
-LOL!-
posted by KatiiCullen94
dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that bạn were real, that bạn all were , that he was.
There is evidence that bạn were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming hoặc not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and bạn diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, hoặc did i make bạn up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without bạn i dont know. But i want to find out. Do bạn think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...
continue reading...
posted by twilight0girl
link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can bạn forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the đường phố, street physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your đít, mông, ass like rembrandt!
Ha! bạn Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when bạn see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who bạn are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what bạn did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who bạn are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...
continue reading...
added by youknowit101
Source: trollposts@tumblr
I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated bởi you.
I was so Chuyện thần tiên ở New York bởi your beauty that I ran into that tường over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.
If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime bạn passed by, just so I could stare at bạn a bit longer.
Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.
You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
For a moment I thought I...
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1)"Why, do bạn find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I tình yêu the một giây grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and bạn actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...
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1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with thêm than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are bạn busy?" hoặc "Are bạn doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all ngày but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...
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posted by sakurahanazono
Alpha kenny body

1.)Write down on a piece of paper "Alpha kenny body" and get someone to read it. (it sounds like they're saying I'll fuck anybody xD)

I won a math debate

2.)Write down "I won a math debate" and once again get someone to read it. (It should sound like they're saying I want to masterbate xD)

Eye map ness

3.) Say: Eye
Spell: Map
Say: ness

Write this down on paper and bạn have to do as instructed on the left. (It sounds like they're saying I'm a penis xD)


Eye Emma rate hard

4.) write down "Eye emma rate hard" down on a piece of paper (it sounds like they're saying I'm a retard)

Eye M egg ay

5.) Say: Eye
Say: M
Say: egg
Say: ay

(It should sound like they're saying I am a gay xD)
1. Walk up to them and ask them for their autographs.
2. Walk up to them, introduce yourself extremely upbeat and friendly-like and end the conversation bởi saying "It was nice to meet you. It's so cool to talk to people outside of the asylum." Then walk away.
3. While walking down the street, in a mall hoặc any other such place, laugh out loud for no apparent reason. Be as creative with the way bạn laugh as bạn wish.
4. Run up to them, excitedly calling them Father, Mother, Aunt hoặc Uncle. If bạn dare, hug them.
5. While passing a ngẫu nhiên stranger, stop and exclaim to them, "You have no idea!" in a...
continue reading...
added by loonybug
Source: tumblr
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: dumage
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: listal
added by ilovekud
Source: ilovekud
added by Shelly_McShelly
posted by karpach_14
Bored? Need something to spice up your day? Why not annoy the living shit out of someone bạn love? Here are a few suggestions.

1. Go to the library. Every 15 minutes, go up to the same guy and joke, "Working hard hoặc hardly working?"

2. At the dentist, start screaming as soon as bạn open your mouth.

3. Stand in front of the TV while your dad is watching a big game.

4. Every 30 phút hoặc so, call your friend who is babysitting and breathe into the phone.

5. Scrape your ring hoặc your nails on the blackboard tiếp theo time you're asked to do a problem at the board.

6. tiếp theo buổi hòa nhạc bạn go to, yell out "Mmmbop!"...
continue reading...
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