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1.Make race car noises when anyone gets on hoặc off.

2.Blow your nose and offer to hiển thị the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

3.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: Shut up, dammit, all of bạn just shut UP!

4.Whistle the first seven notes of It's a Small World incessantly.

5.Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6.On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

7.Shave.

8.Crack open your cặp, vali, cặp tài liệu hoặc purse, and while peering inside ask: Got enough air in there?

9.Offer name tag to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

10.Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

11.When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open bởi themselves.

12.Lean over to another passenger and whisper: Noogie patrol coming!

13.Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call bạn Admiral.

14.Censored bởi your son.

15.On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until bạn hear the penny bạn dropped down the shaft go plink at the bottom.

16.Do Tai Chi exercises.

17.Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: I've got new socks on!

18.When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!

19.Give religious tracts to each passenger.

20.Meow occassionally.

21.Bet the other passengers bạn can fit a quarter in your nose.

22.Frown and mutter gotta go, gotta go then sigh and say oops!

23.Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

24.Sing Mary had a little cừu, thịt cừu while continually pushing buttons.

25.Holler Chutes away! whenever the elevator descends.

26.Walk on with a mát, máy làm mát that says human head on the side.

27.Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce You're one of THEM! and di chuyển to the far corner of the elevator.

28.Burp, and then say mmmm...tasty!

29.Leave a box between the doors.

30.Ask each passenger getting on if bạn can push the button for them.

31.Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers through it.

32.Start a sing-along.

33.When the elevator is silent, look around and ask is that your beeper?

34.Play the harmonica.

35.Shadow box.

36.Say Ding! at each floor.

37.Lean against the button panel.

38.Say I wonder what all these do and push the red buttons.

39.Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

40.Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your personal space.

41.Bring a chair along.

42.Take a bite of a sandwich, bánh sandwich and ask another passenger: Wanna see wha in muh mouf?

43.Blow spit bubbles.

44.Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

45.Announce in a demonic voice: I must find a thêm suitable host body.

46.Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.

47.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

48.Wear X-Ray Specs and leer suggestively at other passengers.

49.Stare at your thumb and say I think it's getting larger.

50.If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler Bad touch!

50 Shake the person's hand when he/she enter the lift.

51 Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.

Announce to the person stood tiếp theo to bạn "I really need the toilet. Can I use your bag?"

52) Ask the other passengers "Wouldn't be great if this lift were to plumment to the floor, what do bạn think will happen?"

53) Petend to get your leg stuck in the door as it closes

53) Without letting anyone see, press the emergency stop button. Act surprised and start talking to yourself "its ok, it wasnt your fault bạn killed your family. It was SATAN, damm bạn SATAN! DAMN YOU!!!" Then press the stop button again and act as if nothing has happened.

54) Scratch yourself excessively saying "fucking headlice. They're all over me. I knew I shouldn't have played with that dog so much"

55) Set out a pinic set on the floor and suggest to the other passengers to tham gia bạn in afternoon tea

56) Break wind and blame it on the person tiếp theo to you

57) Pretend your are a repair man here to fix the lift. Wait untill its busy and tell everyone to get out of the lift. bạn get in, get your paper out and sit and relax

58) Start to talk about your sexlife. Tell them that all of your three children were concived in this very lift. And point and say "it was up against that wall"

59) Have sex with your imaginary friend

60) Say bạn have just won the lottery and bạn are on your way to collect your winnings. See how many people are listening to you

61) As the lift descends, shout "Bombs away!"

62) Offer to polish their shoes. When they say no, tell them bạn need the money to feed your ten starving children back trang chủ in Estonia

63) Hand out leaflets - "what to do when the lift cable breaks. The ten tips that will keep your body in one pice (although these tips will not save your life, it will make the rescue a bit cleaner, and we wont have to spend ages cleaning the blood of the walls) Hope bạn will live to do it again!"

64) Perform a striptease

65) Act surprised when it starts to di chuyển and say "THE GROUND IS FALLING!"

66) Fake an orgasam when the lift starts to move. Announce that it was your best ever

67) Let your mobile phone ring - don't anwser it.

68) Walk in to the lift with a clear bottle of táo, apple juice. Start drinking and say "ah, theres nothing like your own urine to quench your first. Does anyone want some?"

69) Say "this new g-sring is really starting to hurt." Then attempt to adjust it.

70) Walk into the lift and say "this reminds me of being burried alive. Ah those were the days"

71) Suggest to the other passengers that bạn all should play a game of twister. Then get out the board and lie it on the floor

72)Paint the walls of the lift.

73) On entering, ask the passengers "Will bạn be my fwiend?". Burst into tears if they say no.

74) Stop the lift and say "twenty years in prison for murdering the whole family, and I get stuck in a lift after being out for two hours. Just my luck!"

75) Get back to nature - go in naked

76) Pretend to be the pilot of the lift, speach into a headset "this is lift number 1, ready for decent to 1st floor. Waiting for permission to depart, over"

77) Announce in a computer like voice "this lift will self destruct in 5 4 3 2 .....oh heres my floor"

78) Serve trà and coffee

79) Take shoes off before entering, Look shocked and disgusted when the others dont

80) Act like the sergent of the lift. Order people around. Tell them to get in line.

81) Suggest to the other people that your should play musical statues. Bring a tape recorder along too

82) Teach the people french. Dont let them leave till they get it right

83) As bạn are coming to the end of the journey, get enmotional and have a group hug. Tell them that bạn will never forget them.

84) Insist, the lift ride costs £2.50

85) Describe in detail, how you're "hung like a horse"

86) Pretend to be a flight attendant (particularly affective if bạn are dressed like one), instruct the passengers on what to do in an emergency

87) Yodel

88) Bring out a magnifying glass, closey inspect the other passengers skin and say "ooh, look at your pores"

89) Sing "I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get on your nerves, get, get, get on your nerves" Over and over again.

90) Ask the others "Do bạn mind if I do my Eminem impression?", then bring out a chainsaw and a mask.

91) Try breakdancing

92) Bring out a fake toy gun and shout to the person tiếp theo to bạn "you lookin' at me?"

93) Challenge the guy stood tiếp theo to bạn to a "thumb war".

94) Explain your ideas of world domination to the wall.

95) Force people to read to Kama Sutra while asking "do bạn wanna try this one?"

96) Dress up in a long, black áo choàng with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "it is time..."

97) Pretend to see a spider, repeatedly and violently stamp on the floor while screaming "Die bạn bastard, die DIIEEE!"

98) While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.

99) If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"

100) Wave hands wildly at invisible flies buzzing around your head.

101) Explain to the passengers that this lift looks the same as the ones on all the other floors.

102) Re-enact scenes from a movie where someone climbs out through the roof.

103) Tell people their clothes are stuck in the lift door, when the look round and see it isn't, apologise, then 5 giây later say it again in exactly the same tone of voice.

104) Strip naked and ask if 'your' (not my) bum looks big in this dress.

105) Release cockroaches and rats hoặc doves.

106) Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.

107) Point a ngọn lửa, chữa cháy extinguisher at the door as it opens and a passenger tries to enter, ready, aim, and bend the nozzle round and cover yourself with foam.

108) Blast out some heavy metal âm nhạc (Rammstein hoặc Disturbed oughtta do the trick) sing along, while headbanging.

109) Dress up as a bellboy and ask them what floor they want and press the wrong one. When they try to correct you, spit,"are bạn trying to say i cant do my job?!'

110) Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.

I found this online :P
So you've just traveled to a foreign country, taken a subway bạn never take, hoặc teleported to medieval England due to a time travel mishap. Your surroundings are strange, confusing, and possibly haunted. But instead of freaking out—due to frustration, confusions, and ghosts, respectively—you should follow these expert pointers to get yourself from Mất tích to un-lost.

1) DO ask for directions. DO NOT ask an axe murderer for directions.
People who see bạn crying over a crumpled map are almost always helpful (axe murderers being a notable exception). Look for some official-seeming person hoặc kindly...
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Like the tiêu đề says, Does Robert Pattinson die in remember me? My Những người bạn đã đưa ý kiến that he does and I just wanted to know. :):) :)
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:) :) :) :)
Haley:Hey!Guys let's compare our self's to anime and cartoon characters!

James:Okay.I'll go first!Haley bạn remind me of...Akira Kogami from lucky star!

Haley:...I do NOT have constant mood swings between happy and cute to mean and bitchy!YOU FRIGGIN' SON OF A WHORE!!!

James:Haley I know what my parents are.

Jack:W-What!?

Haley:Alex bạn remind me of...Alucard from Hellsing!

Alex:...That's nice...Kara reminds me of Haruhi Fujioka from Ouran high school host club.Bland and uninteresting.

Kara:Oh screw you!...Melissa you...wait how did bạn get into my house?

Melissa:Well I'll have bạn know I invited my...
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posted by HaleyDewit
Chris went to his bedroom and sank down on his bed. He lay down and stared at the ceiling. He wondered how the world outside would be like. Sure he had a clear view from behind his window, but it wasn’t the same as really be outside. He heard a familiar noise and a few giây later Bianca materialized in the center of his room. He looked up at her, with an angry look in his eyes.
“Thanks for betraying me, Bi” Bianca sighed and shrugged. “I was only trying to help you. Wyatt shouldn’t be treating bạn this way and bạn know it” “What can I do about it? He saved my life. He raised...
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User: Wendigo hoặc yeti.

Cleverbot: Who is Wendigo?

User: Wendigo is a abomination.

Cleverbot: Define abomination.

User: Abomination = # a person who is loathsome hoặc disgusting # abhorrence: hate coupled with disgust # an action that is vicious hoặc vile; an action that arouses disgust hoặc abhorrence; 'his treatment of the children is an abomination'.

Cleverbot: I only fear death, but I cannot even fear that much with bạn at my side.

User: I do not fear death but I fear giving up on life.

User: I've gotta go mate speak bạn soon babe.

Cleverbot: Don't leave!

Cleverbot: Well the meaning of life certainly isn't...
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posted by sapherequeen
It all began when I was eight-years-old. My mother had found a new boyfriend named Nate. The two of them had a steady relationship for some months before they finally decided to find a house to live in together. They relocated a house at a different đường phố, street in the same town I have been living in since I was 10-months-old. At first, it seemed like a nice street. It had this peaceful feeling to it, the feeling that just made bạn feel like home. That was one of my greatest memories of the street, the feeling of trang chủ that it always gave me. I also made new Những người bạn immediately; a little girl named...
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Bananas can sometimes be just as dangerous as lemons, but remember, monkeys touched them a lot, so they have some portion of us stuck in them. Really, they can be just as sentimental as us. I swear, last night my copy of The Blind Side got stolen, and there was a trái chuối, chuối strangely close to the TV.....nevermind. Here's the danh sách bạn have to watch out for:

1.The simplest way is the trái chuối, chuối peel. Bananas like to be wackos and hiển thị themselves to the ladies, so they shed some skin and sit there on the most slippery surface they can get. Of course, they don't care about you---so if bạn are near a slippery...
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WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the bàn with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the sữa carton.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check hoặc charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a ti vi set in her purse.
"So, do bạn always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied,...
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posted by McDreamyluva
LOLs!!

HE: I'm a photographer I've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours

HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No, I'd like to have some pleasure too !

HE: How did bạn get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must have been được trao your share !

HE: Will bạn come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! I'm having a headache this weekend !

HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
SHE: Okay, get out!

HE: I think I could make bạn very happy
SHE: Why? Are bạn leaving?

HE: What would bạn say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh...
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posted by ilovepenguins
1) If tình yêu is blind, then why is there lingerie?
2) Why are they called "apartments" if they are all connected?
3) Should bạn believe a chronic liar if he admits that he is a chronic liar?
4) Did Adam and Eve have bellybuttons?
5) Why is it that chó tình yêu to hang their head out of the car window, but will get mad at bạn if bạn blow in their face?
6) If all the world is a stage, where is the audience?
7) If a cây falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it still make a sound?
8) If pro is the opposite of con, then wouldn't congress be the opposite of progress?
9) If the hình năm góc, hình ngũ giác, lầu năm góc were...
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•    A few clowns short of a circus

•    A few fries short of a Happy Meal

•    A few beers short of a six-pack

•    Dumber than a box of hair

•    A few peas short of a soong, nấu ăn thịt hầm

•    Doesn't have all his cornflakes in one box

•    The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead

•    One Froot Loop shy of a full bowl

•    A few feathers short of a whole con vịt, vịt

•    All foam, no beer...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
•    Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed limit.

•    Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to head bang.

•    At stop lights, eye the person in the tiếp theo car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors.

•    Two words: Chicken suit.

•    Write the words “Help me” on your back window in red paint. The thêm it looks like blood, the better.

•    Stop at the green lights.

•    Go at the red ones.

•    Occasionally...
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posted by Rock_n_Roll671
Okay, I;m not saying bạn should ACTUALLY do this, but if u want to, u can, and put in the các bình luận which ones you're going to try out.
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1. When you're getting a drink of water at the water fountain, and he passes by, get a handfull of water and throw it at the crotch of his pants, and then yell, "HE PEED HIS PANTS!"

2. Run underwear up a flagpoll, solute, and when your princible scolds you, say, "You're just saying that cuz bạn hate America."

3. When bạn go to the princible's office, and when he asks why bạn were sent, say, "I wrote that bạn sucked...
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1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited bởi mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics.They lived in the Sarah món tráng miệng and traveled bởi Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.

2. The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible,Guinessis, Adam and Eve were created from an táo, apple tree. One of their children,Cain, asked, “Am I my brother’s son?”

3. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bánh mỳ, bánh mì which is bánh mỳ, bánh mì made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. He...
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posted by Alexyss_Cullen
bạn came into my life as an unknown face
Not ever knowing our friendship,
I would one ngày embrace
As I wonder Through My thoughts and memories of u,
It Brings many Big Smiles and laughter so true

I tình yêu the special bond that we beutifully share,
I tình yêu the way bạn hiển thị u really care,
Our Friendship means the aboslute world to me
I only hope this is somthin i can make u see,
Not hear

Thank u for opening ur mind and soul,
I will do all i can to help heal,
ur hearts little wholes
Remember ur secrets are forever an toàn, két an toàn within me,
I will keep them under the tightest lock & key

Always Remember..If ur ever in...
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1)At the movies: When bạn meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question: Hey, what are bạn doing here?
Answer: Don't u know, I sell tickets in black over here.

2)In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet...
Stupid Question: Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer: No, not at all, I'm on local anesthesia. Why don't bạn try again?

3)At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask...
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4)At a restaurant: When bạn ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the "Paneer bơ Masala" dish good?...
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xD... I found that alot of ppl are posting these ^^

1. Follow them around the house everywhere.

2. Moo when they say your name.

3. In the grocery store, try to stick as many melons down yer pants as bạn can and then start dancing

4. Say everything backwards.

5. Run into walls.

6. Say that wearing clothes is against your religion.

7. Go into their room at 4 in the morning and say "Good Morning Sunshine!"

8. Snort loudly when bạn laugh and then laugh harder.

9. Everytime they say your name jump up and down rub yer stomach and pat your head.

10. Pluck someone's hair out and yell "DNA!!!"

11. Wear...
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* trái cam, màu da cam Lavaburst
* đào (no longer produced)
* Poppin' màu hồng, hồng Lemonade
* dâu, dâu tây Kiwi Kraze
* Torrential Tropical Punch
* Wild Cherry
* kẹo táo, apple cooler


[edit] Hi-C Blast

* Berry Blue
* Blue Watermelon
* trái cây Pow
* trái cây Punch
* Orange
* trái cam, màu da cam Supernova
* màu hồng, hồng Lemonade
* dâu rừng, quả mâm xôi Kiwi
* Strawberry
* dâu, dâu tây Kiwi
* Wild Berry

[edit] Hi-C chua Blast

* Green Apple
* Strawberry
* Wild Cherry
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THE WORD HI 61 TIMES

hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi
Did bạn really have to leave?
Without saying goodbye
Leaving me in tears
Wondering why?

I was really hoping
to be thêm than a friend
But for some strange reason
My plan had to end

As I recalled
That very special ngày
I was thinking "hey!
What did he have to say?"

During that ngày
there was lots to be đã đưa ý kiến
And I realized that
It all went in my head

When bạn đã đưa ý kiến "I tình yêu you"
I đã đưa ý kiến "I tình yêu bạn too"
But now I'm just questioning
Was it ever true?
__________________________________________________

I promised to be your friend.
Always and Forever.
Never had I thought
We would be thêm
What if I did...
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10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."
9) di chuyển everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an con voi weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.
8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "The hair, it's growing. Growing!"
7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While...
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