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posted by randomgirl3000
Malcolm X (1925-1965) "Cool it, brothers..." (His last words before being assassinated.)
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Karl Marx (1818-1883) "Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't đã đưa ý kiến enough."
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James McLain (1970) [American criminal] "Take lots of pictures! We are the revolutionaries!" (Before being killed bởi the police, as he tried to shoot his way to freedom at his trial.)
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Edwin Henry Murrant (1864-1902) [Australian Anglo-Boer War soldier and poet] "Shoot straight, bạn bastards! Don't make a mess of it!" (To the firing squad that executed him.)
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John Pierpont morgan (1837-1913) "I've got to get to the hàng đầu, đầu trang of the hill..."
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Benito Mussolini (1883-1945) "But, but, mister Colonel..." (Before being executed.)
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Napoleon I (1769-1821) "Chief of the Army."
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Ramon Maria Narvaez (1800-1868) "I do not have to forgive my enemies, I have had them all shot." (Said on his deathbed, when asked bởi a priest if he forgave his enemies.)
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Laurence Olivier (1907-1989) "This isn't Hamlet, bạn know, it's not meant to go into the bloody ear." (To his nurse, who spilt water over him while trying to moisten his lips.)
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Henry John Temple, 3rd Viscount, Palmerston (1784-1865) "Die, my dear Doctor? That's the last thing I shall do!" (Attributed last words.)
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St John Philby (Died1960) "God, I'm bored."
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Pablo Picasso (1881-1973) "Drink to me."
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Elvis Presley (1935-1977) "I hope I haven't bored you." (Concluding what would be his last press conference.)
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Sir Walter Raleigh (1554-1618) "I have a long journey to take, and must bid the company farewell."
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Cecil John Rhodes (1853-1902) "So little done, so much to do."
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James W. Rodgers (Died 1960) [American criminal] "Why yes, a bulletproof vest!" (On his final request before the firing squad.)
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Franklin Delano Roosevelt (1882-1945) "I have a terrific headache."
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Theodore Roosevelt (1858-1919) "Put out the light."
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Ethel Rosenberg (1918-1953) "We are the first victims of American fascism!" (Before her execution.)
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Julius Rosenberg (1918-1953) "We are innocent. That is the whole truth. To forsake this truth is to pay too high a price even for the priceless gift of life. For life thus purchased we could not live out in dignity." (Before his execution.)
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Damon Runyon (1884-1946) "You can keep the things of bronze and stone and give me one man to remember me just once a year."
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Saki (Hector Hugh Munro) (1870-1916) "Put that bloody cigarette out." (Just before being killed bởi a sniper, 14 November 1916)
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George Sanders (1906-1972) "Dear World, I am leaving bạn because I am bored. I am leaving bạn with your worries. Good luck." (His suicide note.)
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John Sedgwick (1813-1864) "Nonsense, they couldn't hit an con voi at this distance." (In response to a suggestion that he should not hiển thị himself over the parapet during the Battle of the Wilderness.)
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George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) "I want to sleep..."
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Adam Smith (1723-1790) "I believe we should adjourn this meeting to another place."
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Gertrude Stein (1874-1946) "Just before she [Stein] died she asked, `What _is_ the answer?' No answer came. She laughed and said, `In that case what is the question?' Then she died."
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Adlai E. Stevenson (1900-1965) "I feel faint." (Before collapsing.)
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Dylan Thomas (1914-1953) "I have just had eighteen whiskeys in a row. I do believe that is a record."
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Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
`Have bạn made your peace with your God?'
`I never quarreled with my God.'
`But aren't bạn concerned about the tiếp theo world?'
`One world at a time.'
(Discussion with his aunt on his deathbed)
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James Thurber (1894-1961) "God bless... God damn."
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Francisco `Pancho' biệt thự (1878-1923) "Don't let it end like this. Tell them I đã đưa ý kiến something."
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Voltaire (1694-1778) "This is no time to make new enemies." (When asked on his deathbed to forswear Satan.)
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William Wallace (1270-1305, Scottish Patriot) "Freedom" [Ascribed to him in the film "Braveheart"; his actual last words, before being hanged, disembowelled, drawn and quartered, are unknown.]
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George Washington (1732-1799) "It is well, I die hard, but I am not afraid to go."
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Daniel Webster (1782-1852) "I still live."
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Herbert George Wells (1866-1946) "Go away... I'm allright."
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Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) "Either this hình nền goes, hoặc I do!" [The authenticity of this quote is complicated bởi his deathbed conversion back to Catholicism and the fact that a priest was with him up to the very end. Another deathbed quotation is also attributed to him: he asked for Champagne to sip as he died, and as he sipped, he is reported to have said: "Alas, I am dying beyond my means."]
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Christopher Scott Emmett(1972-2008) "Tell my family and Những người bạn I tình yêu them, tell the governor he just Mất tích my vote. Y'all hurry this along, I'm dying to get out of here." (Just before his execution in Virginia; he challenged the legality of lethal injections as cruel and unusual punishment, but a federal appeals court rejected his claims.)
added by Gretulee
added by mina27
posted by CullenProperty
1.    Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys tình yêu flirts.
3. A guy can like bạn for a minute, and then forget bạn afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.
5. "Are bạn doing something?" hoặc "Have bạn eaten already?" are the first usual các câu hỏi a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.
6. Guys may be flirting around all ngày but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
7. When a guy really likes you,...
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1. I tình yêu the way we finish each other’s sentences.

2. I tình yêu the way I know you’ll never give up on me.

3. I tình yêu the fact that I wouldn’t ever give up on you.

4. I tình yêu the way bạn look at me.

5. I tình yêu how beautiful your eyes are.

6. I tình yêu the way I can’t imagine a ngày without bạn in my life.

7. I tình yêu the way if we were ever separated I wouldn’t know how to go on.

8. I tình yêu the way we cuddle and watch sunsets together.

9. I tình yêu the way we sometimes stay up all night and just talk, then watch the sunrise together.

10. I tình yêu how I know you’ll always be there when I need bạn to be.

11....
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1. Angus is for a beefy yet cute boyfriend, hoặc to bolster up the woefully sagging self-esteem of a weak, pasty face limb noodle who does your homework for you.

2. Babe - is a classic cute boyfriend nickname that will only get bạn in a slight amount of trouble in front of his friends. ( i call mine this)

3. Baby Boo Boo - is for a boyfriend that you'd like to castrate slowly bởi giving him effeminate names.

4. Bunny-kins - means you're cousins and will be humping like bunnies at the tiếp theo family wedding.

5. Bunny Wabbit - bạn may as well stroke his belly with a coonskin mũ lưỡi trai, cap and feed him grapes when...
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DEMENTED POEMS

hoa hồng are crap
Violets are shit
Sit on my face
And wiggle a bit

hoa hồng are stupid
Violets are silly
Grease up your flaps
Cuz here comes my willy

hoa hồng are awful
Violets are the pits
Lift up your shirt
And hiển thị me your tits

hoa hồng make me laugh
Violets make me titter
You're a dirty bitch
And bạn tình yêu it up the shitter

hoa hồng are straight
Violets are twisted
Bend over love
You're about to get fisted

hoa hồng are crap
Violets are wanky
Oooh I've just cum
Pass me a hanky

hoa hồng are red
It's elementary
Let's ring your best friend
And try double entry

hoa hồng are shit
Violets are crap
hiển thị me your clit
And I'll cum in your lap

hoa hồng are red
Skidmarks are brown
Give me a blow job
And nuốt, nhạn it down

hoa hồng are groovy
Violets are funky
I'm thinking of you
And spanking my monkey
posted by Bubblekat
1. Go around stores, pick up items and yell out really loudly "Who buys this CRAP anyway?!"

2. Get a cart, get on the bar below the bar bạn grip, and push it down the isle, extra points for running into something hoặc someone

3. Go up to a ngẫu nhiên person and say "you have pretty eyes, may I have your eyes?!" and hear to see what they say

4. Laugh randomly

5. If someones talking on a cellphone Go closer to them and start maki ngẫu nhiên noises to disturb them, extra points if they hang up

6. If your near a đài phun nước run to it and start splashing in it

7. If your mom starts nagging to bạn in public about the...
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1. At the movies: When bạn meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are bạn doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia.. …why don’t bạn try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When bạn ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the “Butter Paneer Masala”...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
my friend sent me this text message a while cách đây and i thought it was hilarious!!!




i need to ask bạn somethingand i want bạn to be totally honest with me. it may be awkward between us after this but i have to kow how bạn feel... I've kept it in for a while now but now it's time to be straight up and just confront you. i hope this doesn't ruin anything we have, i just need to know and i dont see any other way i could get over this. it just doesn't seem fair if i dont gett an answer. i want bạn to tell me truthfully, please no matter how harsh it is. i just want your hoest opinion...

Pepsi hoặc Coke?



Ha ha ha ha !!!
Funny.
added by adultswimperson
Source: Google
I found this hilarious bài viết on pcworld.com
Don't know who the tác giả is, but he's funny.

1. Backward Thinking
"I sold my only car to help pay for gas money, but now gas has come down in price. How do I get my car back?"
I tried to contact this guy, but it turns out that he also sold his computer to help pay for his Internet connection.

2. It's huy hiệu Lock--Capisce?
"HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK? I ACCIDENTALLY TURNED IT ON YESTERDAY AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO TURN IT BACK OFF."
Note to self: Register howtoturnoffcapslock.com; make millions.

3. Credit Crunch
"I wanted to see if my computer would read my...
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added by XxKeithHarkinxX
Source: Google
posted by Sheetal1256
Here are some funny New Year's resolutions for 2012...
I will think of a mật khẩu other than "password" hoặc "hello".

I will not tell the same story at every get together.

I won't worry so much.

I will cut my hair.

I will grow my hair.

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits tiếp theo to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!

I will be thêm imaginative.

I will not bore my boss bởi with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some thêm excuses.

I will do less laundry and use thêm deodorant.

I will avoid taking a bath whenever...
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added by Juilet1234
posted by flippy_fan210
Some of bạn might have heard of the game Facade. those of bạn who have, bạn probably wonder why they hate Melons so much. well, this is my theory.
_____________________-_____________________
Trip and Grace used to live in a normal home, no fancy apartment. they had a child, Phoebe. she...really liked melons.

she bought one when she was 5 and never let anyone eat it. they let her keep it. one day, she đã đưa ý kiến "i want a cat". it was totally out of the blue, but they đã đưa ý kiến yes, she got a little black cat and named him Ivan. she really loved him. one day, she took Ivan up to her room. she came down,...
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posted by Usui--takumi
Why was Tigger looking in the bowl??
He was trying to find pooh.
There were three men on an airplane, one of them decides to bring a baby.There is a crash and only three parachutes so they leave the baby behind. When they get to the bottom they hear screaming. They find the baby on the ground. The dad of the baby says, '' How did bạn get down here? ''. The baby replies, '' Me not dumb, me not silly, me hold on to daddy's willy!''
What's black and white, black and white, black and white?
A chim cánh cụt rolling down a hill.
Yo momma so fat, when she jumps her own boobs slap her.
Yo momma so dumb AND fat,...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four các câu hỏi to determine the level of your intellect. Your các câu trả lời must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating hoặc wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: bạn are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in một giây place.
In which position are bạn now?

Answer:

If bạn answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. bạn overtook the một giây runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the tiếp theo câu hỏi try not to be so dumb.

2 : If bạn overtake the last...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
a boy was asked bởi his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes trang chủ and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother các câu trả lời " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad các câu trả lời "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she các câu trả lời "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she các câu trả lời "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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posted by invadercalliope
•Everyone in this place is unhappy. And since they're unhappy, they're probably looking for someone worse off than they are.
•You know who isn't human? bạn know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let bạn go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are bạn enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."

Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."

Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling bạn how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."

Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
What's your personality type?

Picks/Polls
link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link, link
link

(E) Extrovert
-Tend to focus on the outer world of people and the external environment
-Like variety and action
-Often impatient with long, slow jobs
-Are interested in the activities of their work and in how other people do it
-Often act quickly, sometimes without thinking
-Develop ideas bởi discussion
-Like to learn new task bởi talking it through with someone
-Need to experience the world in order to understand it and thus tend to like action

(I) Introverts
-Focus thêm on their own inner world,...
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