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Act like bạn know the order taker from somewhere. Say, "BedWetter’s Camp, right?"
Add extra letters to words, ex: pizza, bánh pizza becomes pizzzzzzzaaaaaaa
After ordering, say, "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.
Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.
Answer their các câu hỏi with questions.
Ask about pizza, bánh pizza maintenance and repair.
Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g., If phoning Domino's, ask for a Cheeser! Cheeser!)
Ask for chips/fries with everything!
Ask for extra homo-sapien
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
Ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza.
Ask if the pizza, bánh pizza has had its shots.
Ask if the pizza, bánh pizza is organically grown.
Ask if them if they get a free ngày with one of the staff if bạn make order over $30.
Ask if they have any idea what is at stake with this pizza.
Ask if they would like to sample your pizza. Suggest an even trade.
Ask if they're familiar with the term "spanking a pizza." Make up a mô tả to go with the term. Ask that this be done to your pizza.
Ask if bạn get to keep the pizza, bánh pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.
Ask if bạn they can put thực phẩm color in the cheese.
Ask the man/woman if they can sculpt the pizza, bánh pizza into your yêu thích celebrity.
Ask them to not put a band-aid on it this time hoặc bạn will sue.
Ask to see a menu.
Ask what the order taker is wearing.
Ask what their phone number is. Hang up, call them, and ask again.
Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.
backwards pizza, bánh pizza your order
Be vague in your order.
Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be ashamed.
Call to complain about service. Later, call to say bạn were drunk and didn't mean it.
Change your accent every three seconds.
Crack your knuckles into the receiver.
Dance all around the word "pizza." Avoid saying it at all costs. If (s)he says it, say, "Please don't mention that word."
Detect the order taker's psychic aura. Use it to your advantage.
Do not name the toppings bạn want. Rather, spell them out.
Doze off in the middle of the order, catch yourself, and say, "Where was I? Who are you?"
Eliminate verbs from your speech.
Engage in some serious swapping.
Get taker's name. Later, call exactly on the giờ to say, "This is your time of ngày wake-up call, So-and-so." Hang up.
Give them your address, exclaim, "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up
Haggle.
Have a movie with a good car chase scene playing loudly in the background. Yell "OW!" when a bullet is fired.
Have your pizza, bánh pizza "shaken, not stirred."
If (s)he suggests a side order, ask why (s)he is punishing you.
If any of the above practices are rejected bởi the order taker, say, in your best pouty voice, "Last guy let me do it."
If he/she suggests anything, adamantly declare, "I shall not be swayed bởi your sweet words."
If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say, "Okay, that'll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window."
If using a touch-tone press 9-1-1 every 5 giây throughout the order.
If using a touch-tone, press ngẫu nhiên numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
If bạn live tiếp theo door hoặc on the same block as the pizza, bánh pizza place, ask them to deliver with their pizza, bánh pizza truck.
Imitate the order taker's voice.
In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and ask if they have something outlandishly sinful.
Keep telling the order taker about the other pizza, bánh pizza place bạn sued last year.
Laugh every một phút hoặc two, mention the cat in the microwave!
Learn the topping codes hoặc abbreviations and use them instead of the name (e.g. pp instead of double pepperoni).
Learn to play a blues riff on the harmonica. Stop talking at regular intervals to play it
Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.
Make a danh sách of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.
Make the first topping bạn order mushrooms. Make the last thing bạn say, "No mushrooms, please." Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.
di chuyển the mouthpiece farther and farther from your lips as bạn speak. When the call ends, jerk the mouthpiece back into place and scream GOODBYE at the hàng đầu, đầu trang of your lungs.
Mumble, "There's a bomb under your seat." When asked to repeat that, say, "I said, 'sauce smothered with meat'."
Offer to pay for the pizza, bánh pizza with a public flogging.
Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation bạn are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.
Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
Order a one-inch pizza.
Order a slice, not a whole pizza.
Order a steamed pizza.
Order one with ants.
Order term life insurance.
Order the most expensive pizza, bánh pizza and have it sent to your boss!
Order two toppings, then say, "No, they'll start fighting."
Order using lines from different phim chiếu rạp (Luke, I am your "customer"-Darth Vader)
Order while using an electric dao, con dao sharpener.
Order with a Speak-n-Spell where applicable.
Order your pizza, hát in falseto!
Pass the phone around to everyone in the house -- have each person change the order a little.
Perfect a celebrity's voice. Stress that bạn won't take any crap from some two-bit can't-hack-it pimple-faced gofer.
Play a sitar in the background.
Pretend that bạn were trying to call 911 when they tell bạn bạn have the wrong # say oh well start to order... In the middle of your order stop and start to panic and yell “IT’S ABOUT TO BLOW” and hang up.
Pretend your flying a jet fighter in the Gulf War while ordering.
Psychoanalyze the order taker.
Put an extra edge in your voice when bạn say "crazy bread."
Put the accent on the last syllable of "pepperoni." Use the long "i" sound.
Put them on hold.
Quote Carl Sandberg.
Rattle off your order with a determined air. If they ask if bạn would like drinks with that, panic and become disoriented.
Rent a pizza.
Repeat every third third word twice
báo cáo a petty theft to the order taker.
Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.
Say it's your anniversary and you'd appreciate if the deliverer hid behind some furniture waiting for your spouse to arrive so bạn can surprise him/her.
Say you'll be able to pay for this when the movie people call back.
Say your order as fast as humanly possible.
Say, "Are bạn sure this is pizza, bánh pizza Place? When they say yes, say, "Well, so is this! You've got some explaining to do!" When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact, pizza, bánh pizza Place, start to cry and ask, "Do bạn know what it's like to be lied to?"
Say, "Kssssssssssssssht" rather loudly into the phone. Ask if they felt that.
Shout, "I'm through with (wo)men! Send me a dozen of your best, Gaston!"
Sing the order to the tune of your yêu thích song from Metallica's Master of Puppets CD.
Spill out your life story and ask them to they understand, if they say yes, Scream "liars, I don't believe you!" and hang up!
Start the conversation bởi reciting today's ngày and saying, "This may be my last entry."
Start the conversation with "My Call to pizza, bánh pizza Place, Take 1, and. . . action!"
Start your order with "I'd like. . .". A little later, slap yourself and say, "No, I don't."
State your order and say that's as far as this relationship is going to get.
St-tt-t-utter, b-b-bb-badly
Stutter on the letter "p."
Teach the order taker a secret code. Use the code on all subsequent orders.
Tell the order taker a rival pizza, bánh pizza place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.
Tell the order taker to tell the manager to tell his supervisor he' fired.
Tell the order taker you're depressed. Get him/her to cheer bạn up.
Tell them to double-check to make sure your pizza, bánh pizza is, in fact, dead.
Tell them to put the crust on hàng đầu, đầu trang this time.
Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."
Try to talk while drinking something.
Use CB lingo where applicable.
Use expletives like "Great Caesar's Ghost" and "Joseph and Mary in Tinsel Town."
When listing toppings bạn want on your pizza, include another pizza.
When ordering a pizza, burst out in tears every 2 phút
When the order is repeated, change it slightly. When it is repeated again, change it again. On the third time, say, "You just don't get it, do you?"
When they repeat your order, say, "Again, with a little thêm OOMPH this time."
When they say, "What would bạn like?"--say, "Huh? Oh, bạn mean now."
When they say, "Will that be all?"--snicker and say, "We'll find out, won't we?"
When you'ge được trao the price, say, "Ooooooo, that sounds complicated. I hate math."
While on the phone, fake entering puberty. Fluctuate pitch often; act embarrassed.
Wonder aloud if bạn should trim those nose hairs.
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