LOL – Liên minh huyền thoại I'll add as many as possible. = )
#1
It got crowded in heaven, so, for one ngày it was decided only to accept people who had really had a bad ngày on the ngày they died. St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and đã đưa ý kiến to the first man, "Tell me about the ngày bạn died."
The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came trang chủ early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge bởi his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a tim, trái tim attack, and I died."
St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in.
He then asked the tiếp theo man in line about the ngày he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," đã đưa ý kiến the một giây man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"
St. Peter chuckled, let him into heaven and decided he could really start to enjoy this job.
"Tell me about the ngày bạn died?", he đã đưa ý kiến to the third man in line.
"OK, picture this, I'm naked, hiding inside a refrigerator ..."
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#2
There is the story of a preacher who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
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#3
A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help bạn understand my sermon, I want bạn all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a hiển thị of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up. The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."
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Oops! fanpop shortened my answer, so I'll just give bạn the link to the site. Be careful though. Most of the jokes are really bad. There are few good ones.
Anyway, I hope that I helped, and good luck!
link = )
