I'd always had some hope inside me, hope that shined like the brightest star, because that was just me. Yuri Satomi. I knew there was hope; that little light at the end of the long tunnel that kept someone walking, that hand always pulling bạn up when bạn don't know what to do anymore?
Well. That hope, if there ever was some inside me, was gone. Forever gone.
I guess I should start from the very beginning, my story, when I had first met Duncan.
I pounded on the carpeted floor. I was eleven, and really, really annoyed. I sobbed, long and deep, my blonde streak falling into my tear-stained eyes. "Stop it..." I managed, trying to push the twelve-year-old boy in front of me away. "Go away, Duncan."
"I won't go away," he insisted. "I just wanted to say hi!"
"Go AWAY!" I shouted, hitting him in the face, flinching as he drew back.
"Sorry, Yuri!" He gasped. "I đã đưa ý kiến I was sorry."
I growled. "You are not sorry. bạn were never sorry. Leave me alone."
I stared into his eyes, feeling some of me sadness vanish, and it was abruptly replaced bởi wonder and a weird longing.
"Dammit, Duncan," I whispered. "Go away."
"Forget it, Yuri!" He snapped, and he ran away, and I had no idea what he was up to.
My knees crumpled, and I fell to the ground, sobbing. My cheek brushed a dandelion, and I groaned. A single, clear teardrop spattered on my blue sweater, and I gave in to myself, lying there. I didn't think I could do anything else. He had done that to me, Duncan had hurt me, maybe for life. He... he đã đưa ý kiến that he didn't care about me anymore. We were best friends, and then he just đã đưa ý kiến it, out of nowhere, leaving me hanging.
I lay there until my yêu thích teacher, Ms. Lyrine, found me there, and brushed my tears off my face. "Kiyuri?"
I tried to speak, but I coughed instead to keep from crying.
"What did Duncan do?"
"It's all his fault," I murmured. "He said..."
I paused. "Go on," Ms. Lyrine urged.
"He đã đưa ý kiến that I wasn't his best friend anymore. He đã đưa ý kiến that he didn't care about me. He đã đưa ý kiến that he would bởi happy if I died!"
"I didn't," Duncan murmured, and I realized that he was there, behind my teacher.
"You did!" I screamed. "You đã đưa ý kiến you..."
"I know what I said, Yuri. I didn't mean it!"
"Stop it. Go away."
"Duncan, why did bạn say that to Kiyuri?"
"I đã đưa ý kiến I didn't mean it!" Duncan argued.
"Do not EVER say that again, if bạn didn't mean it, Duncan."
I blinked, and the tears threatened to overflow.
"Alright, ma'am," Duncan gave in.
"Thank you, Duncan." Ms. Lyrine's voice was soft. "There, now. Are bạn okay, Yuri?"
No,, I almost said. No way. How do bạn expect me to be OKAY?!
But all I did was nod. What else could I do?
Ms. Lyrine patted my hair. And she left, leaving me and Duncan.
"Yuri, why won't bạn believe me?"
"Because I don't." I shivered.
Duncan sniffed. "Why don't you?"
"Because that's all bạn are." My voice was dangerous. "That's all bạn want, power. bạn don't care about anyone, Duncan. Not me, not anyone."
"That's not true!" He protested. "Yuri!"
I avoided staring into his eyes, so that wouldn't distract me.
"It's true," I snarled. I'd never been easy to forgive someone. "And bạn know what, Duncan? I don't care, either. I don't care if bạn go away, if bạn disappear from this world forever."
It wasn't true, obviously, but at that moment, I just wanted to hurt him. I would do anything.
He patted my head, and I stared at him. "What?"
"I said, what?" I demanded.
"I care, Yuri," he đã đưa ý kiến seriously.
"I don't," I snapped.
Duncan sighed. "I'll leave you, Yuri. If bạn want."
"Go away forever. Do that, and I'll be happy."
He smiled. "Not likely, Yuri."
"Go away!" I repeated, with thêm emphasis.
And he did, leaving me there, along, my face buried in the long grass, wishing I was dead.