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^.^ Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
This is NOT mine, I found it link. Thought this was funny....enjoy!
"Whew, that's one terrific spread!"

"I'm in the mood for a little dark meat."

"Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist."

"Talk about a huge breast!"

"It's Cool Whip time!"

"If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!"

"Are bạn ready for giây yet?"

"Are bạn going to come again tiếp theo time?"

"It's a little dry, do bạn still want to eat it?"

"Just wait your turn, you'll get some!"

"Don't play with your meat."

"Just spread the legs open & stuff it in."

"Do bạn think you'll be able to handle...
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posted by Usui--takumi
Battle of Wits
Subuddhi and Kubuddhi were always trying to get the better of each other. One day, in October, Kubuddhi saw a trái xoài, xoài growing on his tree. He knocked it down, wrapped it in a cloth and waited for Subuddhi to come by. When he did he called out to him. "I have a riddle for you," he said. "Can bạn tell me what trái cây is wrapped in this cloth? If bạn guess correctly bạn may take anyone thing from my house that bạn can carry out with your two hands; if bạn fail I'll come to your house and carry away something."
"All right," đã đưa ý kiến Subuddhi, always ready to match his wits with Kubuddhi. "It...
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hàng đầu, đầu trang 10 signs your partner needs a vacation


1) He keeps handcuffing himself bởi accident.

2) He is starting to develop a crush on one of the transvestite hookers he arrested.

3) He wants to transfer to a K-9 unit because he thinks he'd look good in a collar.

4) He talks to himself. Half of him is the "good cop", and the other half is the "bad cop."

5) He wants bạn to call him "Judge Dredd", and he insists that all suspects should be executed right there on the spot.

6) He keeps asking bạn if his bullet proof vest makes him look fat.

7) He is exchanging donut recipes with complete strangers.

8) The perpetrators beg him to stop talking about his hemorrhoids.

9) Every Tuesday he insists it's his turn to be the siren.

10) He wants to hear less talk and thêm âm nhạc on the police channel
 Brought to bạn bởi trent-lover123
Brought to you by trent-lover123
Kiara:ow....ow.....ow....ow....ow...ow...OWWWWW!!!
Nurse:I didn't do any thing yet???
Kiara:oh??
Nurse:I GOT THE RESALTSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
Kiara:weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell!!!!!!!!!!!
Nurse:your leg is....

Ichigo:WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY FACE!!!!!!
Alexa:every thing your eyes bạn mouth your four head well every thing...
Ichigo:YOU MAKE NO SENSE!!!!
Alexa:are bạn sure are bạn really sure about that?
Ichigo:YEEEEEEEEEEEEEES IM SURE!!!
*Alexa is blushing*
Alexa:your so flattering Ichigo.
Ichigo:WHHHHHAAAAAAAT!!!
*still blushing*
ALEXA:oh just stop it your making me blush....
*Ichigo starts blushing*
Ichigo:You...
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posted by I_love_Mikey
Before bạn read this, note that this is not in anyway encouraging the abuse of illegal, hoặc even legal substances. This is simply stating that it will take bạn down a dark road - one that once bạn start, bạn can't go back. You'll be falling through quicksand, without arms, and no one's going to pull bạn out.

I am lost.
An impossible path I'd sought.
But only treachery it brought.
And pre-decided fights I had fought -
All of which I, unfortunately, lost.

Loved, I am, and also feared.
Silence blares, it rings out clear.
Yet, we stay together, huddled near.
The silence is still all I can hear.

Lies persist...
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posted by KatiiCullen94
my thoughts at the moment..

1.
i dont know what people see anymore.
i think thêm people decide what it is they really saw, jsut to make them feel better.
Because anything can be anything bạn want it to be.

2.
i dont think bạn relize it when your changing, because your always feeling normal, its takes someone to look at you, that someone doesn't have to know you, to tell bạn your wrong about self.

3.
The biggest mistake bạn can make it letting someone too close, because like newtons first law, one will continue to do whatever it is doing unless a force interuppts. That force can be anything....
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posted by Mallory101
This should probably be taped
to your bathroom mirror
where one could read it every day.
bạn may not realize it,
but it's 100% true.


1. There are at least two people in this world
that bạn would die for.


2.. At least 15 people in this world
tình yêu bạn in some way.


3. The only reason anyone would ever hate bạn
is because they want to
be just like you.


4. A smile from bạn can bring happiness to anyone,
even if they don't
like you.


5. Every night,
SOMEONE thinks about bạn
before they go to sleep.


6. bạn mean the world to someone.


7. bạn are special and unique.


8. Someone that bạn don't even know exists loves you.


9. When bạn make the biggest mistake ever,
something good comes from it.


10. When bạn think the world
has turned its back on bạn
take another look.


11. Always remember the compliments bạn received.
Forget about the rude remarks.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: Why are we always standing in front of the exact same house?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Don't ask me. Ask the director.
Master Sword: He's not even here.
Tom: Why not?
Master Sword: He got arrested for drunk driving, and attacking a police officer, thinking it was a zombie panda.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Strange.... very very strange. Today's crossover parody, Barbie: Life In The Russian Front....
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I missed my chance.. I'm always one năm behind in this show.. But now that their hiển thị every episode in order, to prepare for the new season 7, so I'm getting my chance.

I'm so excited, especially cause it has Steven Ogg in it now. (AKA, this guy).



It's pretty easy to say that Grand Theft Auto did a lot for this guy, cause now just about everyone knows who he is.

It's weird how he always protrays nutcase's like Trevor, when the real Steve Ogg is such a nice guy from what I can tell.

But still, the guy that portrayed Trevor Phillips.
How can that NOT be awesome for the dark, violent, nature of a hiển thị like Walking Dead?

Where, even someone as kind hearted as Rick Grimes has murdered people in cold blood, in newer seasons he doesn't even feel remorse anymore.

But, yeah.. Steve Ogg.. I'm excited :)
(I made this around two years cách đây and never finished it so..... HERE bạn GO. XD)

(By the way, this was originally going to be a video so expect to see some *Insert Here* moments. :P Not that it matters, I doubt anyone will even read all this anyways but WHATEVER. ENJOY.)

Ah, Atari. A classic game company that made so many classic titles. Among those were some of my personal favorites, con rết and Millipede. First off, Centipede, released in 1981, was a vertically oriented shoot em up classic designed bởi Ed Logg, who also made Super Breakout and co-developed the game Asteroids with Lyle Rains....
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posted by Irk_Invader_Eve
AGONY
I am here. I am everywhere
Every place you've been I have waited
Every face you've seen I have worn
I have not one name but thousands
I come on the wings of an epidemic
Of a massacre
A lone scream in the night
Announced bởi the distant thunder of a war
or the bleat of the slaughtered calf
I visit the dying in their burning skin
Devour the bodies of the sick
I crush the hearts of the hopeful as I dance on the backs of the weak
Your greatest fears are my delight
With your cries bạn invite me in
I am the betrayal bạn could not have seen
The killer bạn thought bạn knew
One ngày I will be your mother hoặc your...
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These trích dẫn are trích dẫn with differnt meanings of tọc mạch, chồn, ferret hoặc just the animal.
“If a tọc mạch, chồn, ferret bites bạn it is nearly always your own fault.”
“To go rabbit hunting with a dead ferret"
“I'm not sure what the các lượt xem are. I had a private conversation and I did get a feeling ? a feeling. Well, bạn can't take a feeling to the bank. So, it's up to me to try to tọc mạch, chồn, ferret it out.”
“I can't talk to a man who bears an undeserved animosity towards ferrets.”
“You need that U.N. inspection team in there on the ground. They're the people that can find it and tọc mạch, chồn, ferret it out,”
“We still have a lot of work to do, and we still have to work on recovering prairie dog populations so the ferrets can survive.”
The End!
posted by greenstergirl
I if bạn want this to be funny, bạn might want to read hoặc watch the harry potter phim chiếu rạp and books. If bạn already have the just read.


1.    Ask him why he 'doesn't have such a cool scar?'
2.    Tell him that he should get plastic surgery. When he’s done say :I told bạn bạn had a pig nose!!”
3.    Wake him up bởi hát bờ biển, bãi biển Boys songs in his ear. 'Round, round, get around, I get around...’
4.     Smile during Death-Eater meetings and say bạn taught him everything he knows.
5.     Ask him when...
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INTRO-
She sings the songs that she learns from
Jen and all the cool girls
She doesn't know what they mean
But she doesn't really have a care in the world

PRE-
She turn red then she turned redder
What was so funny?
They whispered fierce words about her
She fakes a smile
Pictures the snickers with laughture

CHORUS1-
I said,
Why do bạn always go on?
I got a grip on reality finally
But why should I hold on?
This is too hard for me.
They said;
Didn't your mama ever tell ya?
I thought she'd taught ya well but
You're livin life in a fantasy
Why'd bạn treat your life like a dream?

VS1-
She skipped over to the 4th pew
in...
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posted by thespikedturtle
Ugh...

Everywhere around me at school, I see smoking, fighting, and cursing, I think it's ridiculous. Of course, I don't do any of that, I'm the one bạn may think of as a nerd. Unfortunately, bởi today's standards, "being a nerd" actualy means "doing what's right."

I have musical talents, I can't be humble on that. I'm also pretty smart, I hardly ever study, but I've gotten honor roll all my life. When a lot of people think of me, they think of the talents I have, not my personality. And to me, personality is everything, and I think that's the way it was supposed to be. But all that matters today...
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posted by milorox18
REMEMBER WHEN ...

getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?

the worst thing bạn could get from a boy was c0otiEs?

Mom (was your hero)

and Dad was the boy bạn were gonna marry?

when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings

and Race Issues were about who ran fastest?

when "War" was a card game

and life was simple and care free?

 remember when all bạn wanted to do

WAS GROW UP?
bạn want = bạn want

We need = I want

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious bởi now.

Do what bạn want = You'll pay for this later.

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure... go ahead = I don't want bạn to.

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, bạn moron!

You're ... so manly = bạn need a shave and bạn sweat a lot.

You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all bạn ever think about?

I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I'm on my period.

Be romantic, turn out the lights. = I'm Embarassed

This phòng bếp, nhà bếp is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

I want new curtains = and...
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posted by Dreamtime
when bạn feel the dream is over...

feel the world is on your shoulders

and bạn Mất tích the strength to carry on....~

even though the walls may crumble

and bạn find bạn always stumble through
remember never to surrender to the dark

Cuz if bạn turn another page
you will see that’s not the way
the story has to end
~
and if bạn need to find a way back
feel you’re on the wrong track
give it time, you’ll learn to fly

tomorrow is a new day
and bạn will find your own way :)

you’ll be stronger with each ngày that bạn cry
then you’ll learn to fly ~~

in your head, so many questions?...
the truth is your possession...
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posted by MJisLove4life
Who đã đưa ý kiến car names don't have meanings


FORD

For
Only
Rough
Drivers


HYUNDAI

Hope
You
Understand
Nothing
Drivable
And
Inexpensive

VOLVO 🚖 🚖 🚖 🚖

🚖 Very
🚖 Odd
🚖 Looking
🚖 Vehicular
🚖 Object

PORSCHE 🚘 🚘 🚘 🚘

🚘 Proof
🚘 Of
🚘 Rich
🚘 Spoil
🚘 Children
🚘 Having
🚘 Everything

OPEL 🚑 🚑 🚑

🚑 Old
🚑 People
🚑 Enjoying
🚑 Life

TOYOTA 🚨 🚨 🚨 🚨

🚨 The
🚨 One
🚨 You
🚨 Only
🚨 Trust
🚨 Always

HONDA 🚔 🚔 🚔 🚔

🚔 Hanged
🚔 Over
🚔 Now
🚔 Driving
🚔 Away

BMW 🚘 🚘 🚘 🚘

🚘 Biggest
🚘...
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posted by Weasel1999
IV The Bathroom
Ember had been wandering aimlessly around the endless corridors and baffling twists and turns when she saw how dark it was getting outside. She would have checked her watch if she had one, but she didn’t so she hazarded a guess at it being about 10, 11 o’clock. She was exhausted and needed to find somewhere to sleep.
But first she wanted to take a shower. She hadn’t washed since she arrived at the mansion and it showed. Her soft skin which was normally a delicate pale sứ, đồ sứ was now covered with a light layer of grime.
She had changed a lot since the fire. Her hair which...
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