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Here are my danh sách of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let bạn know now i got alot of these from the Youtube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything hoặc eating anything bạn might spit it hoặc something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the cây chổi, chổi late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the vịnh, bay they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's yêu thích vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the nấm have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do bạn call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do bạn call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do bạn make an octopus giggle ten times?
bạn give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do bạn make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's yêu thích composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between bạn and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't bạn hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher đã đưa ý kiến it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the cà chua blush?
It saw the rau xà lách, salad dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do bạn know if it's raining mèo and dogs?
bạn step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do bạn know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do bạn get Pikachu on a bus?
bạn Pokémon (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't bạn dress with Pikachu in the room?
He'll Pikachu (peek at you)

#27 What do bạn call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
bạn boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton vượt qua, cross the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do bạn call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's màu hồng, hồng and fluffy?
màu hồng, hồng fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
màu hồng, hồng fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when bạn drink 7 coca colas?
bạn burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the cá say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't bạn trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope bạn liked them. Make sure bạn check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
posted by fencingrocks
In my school, we have this dumb period called skills. It is last period, and we switch teachers every day. What we do in skills totally depends on the teacher we have.

Anyways, I was in science skills. My teacher was making us plot the track of Hurricane Katrina. He is oddly obsessed with hurricanes and no one knows why.

He put me at a science bàn in the back of the room, with this girl named Abigail.

Abigail and I had talked before, but we weren’t really that close.

I gathered my hurricane plotting materials, and placed them down on the black science table.

Once class started, Abigail and I...
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posted by jessicamc26
A stoner called the ngọn lửa, chữa cháy department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"






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posted by sapherequeen
 :)
:)
I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a người hâm mộ of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on fanpop towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I tình yêu and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of bạn for the rest of my life :)

I tình yêu bạn all! Have a beautiful, wonderful ngày :D
 -LOL!-
-LOL!-
posted by KatiiCullen94
dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that bạn were real, that bạn all were , that he was.
There is evidence that bạn were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming hoặc not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and bạn diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, hoặc did i make bạn up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without bạn i dont know. But i want to find out. Do bạn think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...
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posted by 7things
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added by Mollymolata
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posted by Canada24
So yeah.. I finally saw this movie. Obviously I'm pretty late to the party. This movie had already passed it's time of being talked about., But I never saw it in theatres. I make a habbit of avoiding horrors in theatres.. Knowing every 5 phút the speakers would blast aggressively in my ears and give me a tim, trái tim attack.

It wasn't until today that I PVR'd it the night before (in HD of coarse) and I finally got to watch it.. In it's entireity..

I was so afriad that all the hype of this movie. My brother, Windwaker430, and most of the internet would mean when I finally see it. It won't be too...
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added by Bratz4life
Bratz The Movie Best Moments!
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Bratz The Movie Serious Shopping to do scene.
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Source: Sweet nhiếp ảnh người hâm mộ art bởi me - KanonKyu
added by KanonKyu
Source: Sweet nhiếp ảnh người hâm mộ art bởi me - KanonKyu