thảo luận Double standards: Gay men versus đồng tính nữ

Cinders posted on Feb 04, 2008 at 05:09PM
It's been my experience that one bothers someone more than the other. Especially for folks who disagree with homosexuality in general (for both sexes). I have to go take an exam in Marxist and Feminist theory, but I will be back.

In the meantime, any thoughts on the topic (I have oodles but will talk later)

thảo luận 16 các câu trả lời

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hơn một năm qua kateliness2 said…
I have honestly never heard of this. But double standards between men and women never surprise me.
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hơn một năm qua mac said…
guys find lesbians hot i dont think girls find gay guys hot
hơn một năm qua Cinders said…
Yes, that's part of it...

I was thinking about how crimes based on sexual orientation happen to men more often than women. I knew a girl (who claimed she was bisexual) who said once that lesbians were OK by her, but she thought that gay men was wrong.

And to my friend who "reminded" me that God disapproved of sodomy, I told her that lesbians were the LEAST likely to practice it.

;) ;) I love semantics.

Also, I read (on someone's blog) how his lesbian friend feels awkward because she feels like gay men are more accepted by their friends (who are mostly female) than lesbians.
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hơn một năm qua amazondebs said…
who says gay men don't turn girls on?
has anyone seen that episode of skins where they go to russia and tony and maxxie has that kiss, that was HOT

and yes i think more crimes are against gay men because more crimes are caused by men, but as mac pointed out generally (i'm the exception yay me) guys accept lesbians as they think there hot,

however i do think gay guys are more easily accepted in to society as they generally tend to attack females friends very easily, i do not know why, i have several gay friends of my own and i still can't seem to pin point it
hơn một năm qua Snerkie said… guys don't turn me on :\ nothing against them i just don't find it "hot".

I think there is just sometimes hate towards lesbians as they may get more attention from how some guys hate gay guys as they can get attention easily from women (somehow a lot have a certain friendliness to them)
hơn một năm qua DrDevience said…
I am fairly certain (though too lazy to check for certain) that the violent crimes are heavily weighted against Gay Males.

I would theorize that this is because males seem to feel very threatened by their very existence - like it's contageous or some such nonsense. These males who tend toward violence are not threatened by females.
hơn một năm qua amazondebs said…
ha ha just relised my typo
"tend to attack females friends" lol
i meant attrack
hơn một năm qua Cinders said…
You mean "attract" lol.
hơn một năm qua amazondebs said…
sorry my spelling is so bad, lol i need one of them practising books from junior school
hơn một năm qua knifewrench said…
Debbs, to make you feel better, I did some research and it seems that you're not exactly a freak of nature to find gay men attractive, it seems it's about 50/50.
hơn một năm qua amazondebs said…
*click fingers* awww dam it i wanted to be a freak of nature

but interesting fact
hơn một năm qua Cinders said…
OK, I'm coming out of the closet...

I think gay men are hot too.


*Runs away!*
hơn một năm qua amazondebs said…
ha ha ha!!!
hơn một năm qua MissKnowItAll said…
To be honest, I don't know whether I find gay men 'hot'. I certainly find a lot of gay men huggable (like David Hyde Peirce) But that's probably not just because they are gay.
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hơn một năm qua misanthrope86 said…
This forum just popped up again, so I discovered it and will add my ten cents! But be warned, what I have to say is a little graphic and may not sit well with people. Please let me know if it is too graphic and I will delete my comment. But I don't think it will be.

History time:
In the olden days (approximately 1800's I think, but I am TERRIBLE at remembering timelines and dates, so I could be off on that), when male homosexuality was a crime, some bright spark thought "hey, I wonder if women can be gay too?" So a bunch of doctors went around various women and measured the length of their clitorises (clitori? clitorata? anyone know the plural of clitoris?) and determined that women could not possibly engage in sexual relations with each other because they did not posess a sexual organ that was long enough to be used for vaginal penetration. Of course, at the time, the concept of sex was something constructed by men and so they only way that they could think about sex was the old penis-in-vagina method or the homosexual penis-in-anus method that was unacceptable at the time, so it was determined that women could not be homosexuals because they could not use their sexual organs in the ways that these doctors and researchers assumed to be the only ways to have sex.

SO, a definite bias presents itself here, as female homosexuality, while it exsisted for sure, was not even recognised as possible. Over time, people came to realise that it was in fact possible for a woman to have sex with another woman, and then this idea started growing about women and secrecy and deviance. For example, woman have been keeping this secret that they can have sex with each other and they have probably been sleeping together and having orgies behind man's back. And from that, the lesbian fetish seems to have been born, while the remnants of the male-homosexuality-as-sin/illegal/wrong way of thinking have remained as well.

Of course, love, romance and friendship was completely ignored at the time (and some might argue that it still is) and both male and female homosexuality, as concepts, have been defined in terms of male heterosexuality. Male homosexuality opposes male heterosexuality, while female homosexuality subverts it, leading to a difference in how each is percieved. That difference doesn't always exsist of course, but I think it does quite strongly link to the double-standard you are talking about.
hơn một năm qua Eline_K said…
I see your point about the double standard. I live in the Netherlands and here most people are pretty open minded (gays can marry and adopt kids). However I do see that lesbians are more accepted then gays (not by everyone of course, but by some).

It might have something to do with guys finding two girls hot, but also with guys being afraid to be seen as gay themselves. If they say openly that they don't mind two guys kissing, they might be afraid other people will think their gay too. However it is strange that I never see this with girls. I ofter hear girls say they don't mind seeing two girls kissing (or even saying they'd like to try it themselves sometimes) and no one ever thinks their gay. So maybe being lesbian is more 'mainstream' then being gay?

And about the two guys kissing hot or not debate: have you ever seen Chris Keller and Tobias Beecher in Oz?! That is just HOT! If you've never seen it, youtube it and you will understand!